Opiate of the Masses

Moving Day!

2010-03-21T16:06:00.003-05:00

Well, it has been pretty quiet around here lately. Clearly it is time to move! If you're still following this blog you can find the new an improved Opiate of the Masses at http://www.the-opiate.com or point you feed aggregater at http://feeds.feedburner.com/the-opiate/cbGM

Hope to see you in the new joint!

What awaits...

2009-04-03T10:19:00.001-05:00

...at the intersection of cute and killer?

Check out today's episode of "The Rack" to find out.

WWJB? - First in a Series

2009-04-02T14:25:00.004-05:00

I am having one of those days where my mind in jumping from item to item and I can not seem to form a coherent thought. This means I have had a couple of stupid-crazy ideas so far today, one of them being compiling a list of things I would buy if I won the lottery. Of course I can't concentrate on this list long enough to make it past the first few items but it occurs to me that this list might be fun to keep therefore I am going to do this list as a series of totally random posts on the Opiate entitled WWJB? or "What Would James Buy?"

Now I would like to present #1 on the WWJB list: A Godzilla Suit.

Why? Because nothing says excess like taking care of mundane chores dressed as Godzilla. Plus I would be about 1/3rd of the way towards hosting my Godzilla-theme party where the attendees have the opportunity to dress as Godzilla and destroy parts of Tokyo.

Random Panels - Justice League of America #29

2009-03-04T21:47:00.000-06:00

Usually I post panels here that strike me as funny however I just wanted to post this panel which demonstrates what makes comics fun: you can do ANYTHING and the audience buys it. There was not a moment when I saw this panel where I thought, "WTF?!?" This sense of the impossible being possible is something I think the most recent incarnation of the Superman movie franchise lost. This is not to say I did not like the film, to the contrary I REALLY like Singer's Superman, however I think the movie could have used a bit more of this and a bit less of the Dark Knight-esque angst.

From "Star Struck" in the 29th issue of the latest incarnation of Justice League of America.
Len Wein, writer
Chris Cross (makes me want to jump jump), pencils
Rob Stull with Chris Cross (who still makes me want to jump jump), inks

Shadowrun@20

2009-02-28T11:11:00.000-06:00

This past week I learned that Shadowrun, my most favoritest RPG EVAR, turns 20 this year. I have no idea why this was such a surprise as I have been playing the game since I was in high school. Of course it may have been a surprise since I still think of myself as 18 and the thought that I started high school over 20 years ago now is really, really depressing.

Anyhoo, as part of the celebration* the Shadowrun developers, now at Catalyst Game Labs, are throwing open the gates and having an open call for anniversary adventures. Here is part of the call from the website:

Shadowrun has enjoyed enormous fan support over the years and many of our current freelancers have come up from the fanbase. So, we’ve decided to try something different this year and give our fans the chance of contributing a little something to the official Shadowrun universe. To celebrate 20 years of Shadowrun, Catalyst Game Labs is inviting fans to submit a proposal for a fully developed, standalone adventure which will be published as an e-book. Furthermore, we’re specifically looking for proposals that play off the stories, plots, and adventures released in Shadowrun’s early years.

I don't know where my adventure notes are, but I do have rather fond memories of an adventure that Jack and I co-GMed back in the day. I might just try and dust off those memories and see if I can get the requisite materials put together before the March 15th deadline**. Personally I think they ought to do this every year but that is just me.

For those of you who might doubt my 'runner cred, I offer this picture of my library of Shadowrun RPG books:

I am only missing some of the newer 4th edition books. Not pictured is my complete collection of the Ka-Ge and Shadowland magazines, my Denver and DMZ boxed sets, and the smattering of Shadowrun novels which I own.

* One of these times I would like to see someone totally blow off the 20th anniversary and have an EPIC blowout for the 21st anniversary.

** If Jack or any of my old players want to help with this, give me a call or shoot me an email.

Random Thought - 2-27-08

2009-02-27T22:21:00.000-06:00

In order for this to be funny you need to know that today was Go Texan Day around the office since the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo, which will be the bane of my commuting existence for the next month, is about to get underway. Thus some people around the office were dressed a little more cowboy than usual.

Earlier today as I was talking with a coworker I heard the distinct sound of slapping coming from one of the lawyers offices and the first thought that went through my mind was, "Man, I did not know that the release of Brokeback Mountain changed the meaning of 'cowboy up' to THAT."

Some days my head hurts me in ways only therapy might be able to heal.

Random Panels - Jack of Fables #30

2009-02-25T19:17:00.000-06:00

I thought this panel was appropriate in light of President Obama's speech last night.

From the ALWAYS excellent and highly recommended Fables, in this case issue #30, "The Book of Restoration"
Matthew Sturges & Bill Willingham, writers
Russ Braun, pencils
Jose Marzan, inks

Halloween 1977

2009-02-24T00:07:00.001-06:00

I mentioned the FLICKR group Growing Up Star Wars in a linkbloggery post from last month. Flipping through the pictures in this group filled me with jealousy at the awe-inspiring collections of Star Wars toys some of this kids managed to accumulate but more importantly it reminded me of two Halloween costumes my parents built for me or helped me to build. The first was an R2-D2 costume back in 1977. The second was a Yoda costume in '81 or '82.

I asked my mom if she had any pictures of these costumes and as it turns out she had a few of James as R2-D2 which I thought I would share with you guys. Sadly mom has not been able to find any pictures of James the Jedi Master.

Why They Love Monty Python

2009-02-23T03:42:00.000-06:00

How can I follow up that awesome Christmas gift I gave you guys? Well, I thought you might find this interesting:

Thanks to Norm over at Onegoodmove.org!

I <3 LEGO

2009-02-22T15:32:00.003-06:00

Lately there seems to have been a flurry of LEGO related posts showing up across the internets and since I am a follower rather than a leader I thought I would throw some of my favorites here for your enjoyment:

1. LEGO Twin Peaks courtesy of Matt, whose GN Strangeways: Murder Moon you should go forth and purchase. I have never seen ANY Twin Peaks so I can't speak to how authentic this is, however this made me chuckle and thus is worth sharing.

2. Generally abstract art, and particularly abstract sculpture, just bugs the C-R-A-P out of me, however when you make your abstract art out of LEGO, like this guy did, all is forgiven.

3. I can't remember where I found this gallery, but Yamato + LEGO? There is nothing that is not awesome here:

You ought to check out some of fvin's other Brickshelf galleries as well. He has some pretty cool stuff including a few Gundams and a Patlabor.

4. Finally thanks to my buddy Don and the powers of Gizmodo I got to see this. Since it was a slow day seeing that led to finding this, this, this, this, and this via Google. About my only complaint is that people post these PHENOMENAL creations but do not then create sets of instructions for them. I realize part of the fun of LEGO is creating your own stuff, or having Shaq fight sharks, but there are times when I just want to build something new without having to figure things out.

Oh, one last thing, if you are a LEGO fan, then you want to check out TwoMorrows Publishing, publishers of BrickJournal which they describe as "The Magazine for LEGO Enthusiasts!" I picked up a recent issue and enjoyed the art and the articles although, once again, I wish there were more directions.

Bigger and Better

2009-02-21T20:17:00.002-06:00

As Wil often says, we're living in the future and thanks to this guy the future is bigger and better:

Thanks to Danny Choo for pointing this out.

If

2009-02-19T14:20:00.000-06:00

This would be funnier if it was not so true.

From the Feb. 1st edition of the Salt Lake Tribune. Found via The Big Picture, my favorite econoblog.

Thoughts RE: Twitter

2009-02-19T03:49:00.001-06:00

Despite being a geek and loving technology, I tend to be a late adopter when it comes to new technology. I did not own a cellphone until late in 2005 and, despite having owned two of them now, have yet to actually purchase a Blackberry. I did not purchase an iPod until late in 2006. I was not on MySpace until a "friend" created an account for me alleging I was a 16-year-old gay boy from Alaska. Both of my laptops and both of my desktops have been, like both of my Blackberrys, hand-me-downs from friends or, even better, friend's companies.

I think this is largely driven by the fact that I rarely see the utility of all these wonderful toys that people keep ~~releasing~~ unleashing on the public. Another factor that drives this is that I like my technology to work the way it is meant to work and, as intelligent early adopters know, there are going to be kinks which need to be worked out with any bit of tech. Then there is the whole price penalty for being an early adopter and, deep down inside, I am a cheap bastard. But to be honest this has wandered away from the point a bit, which is my somewhat random thoughts on Twitter as I give in and sign up for an account.

I am not certain when Twitter first popped up on my radar. I think it was when one of my coworkers proposed that our team use this to give each other updates on where we were. Since we all have offices within about 200 feet of each other this idea was quickly shelved. (Of course the coworker in question is pretty much the LINUX guy from this TrueNuff Mac commercial spoof and feels the need to incorporate WAY too much tech into our processes. We call him The Complicator.) As Twitter has further penetrated the geek culture to which I pay some modicum of attention it has continued to pop up on my radar intermittently until last month (or maybe it was December) when it finally came up at the office in a legitimate context.

Now in order to answer some of the questions regarding Twitter that came up in this discussion at the office, I find myself creating an account. I was poking around the site when I came across this:

With Twitter, you can stay hyper-connected to your friends and always know what they're doing...Twitter puts you in control and becomes a modern antidote to information overload.

Wait, what? The VERY same product that allows me to stay "hyper-connected" is also a "modern antidote to information overload?" Is it just me or do those two things seem to be EXACT OPPOSITES and, at least to my small mind, mutually exclusive.

Oh well, you can follow me by searching for my name, with initial, or you can view my tweets via http://twitter.com/funkywoodjam.

I think.

Random Panels - Nightwing #150

2009-02-18T04:02:00.001-06:00

"Hey! You got your Batman in my Star Trek!"
"No, YOU got YOUR Star Trek in my Batman!"
Oh, who really cares. A red shirt reference is ALWAYS appreciated by this geek.

From Nightwing #150, "The Great Leap: Conclusion" part of the Batman R.I.P. story arc.
Peter J. Tomasi, Writer
Don Kramer, Penciller
Jay Leisten & Rodney Ramos, Inkers

TRON v. Depeche Mode

2009-02-14T03:56:00.000-06:00

I found this video while cleaning up my backlog of unread posts at io9 and thought it was worth sharing with those of you who might not read io9.

STFU Files: Lucie J. Kim

2009-02-13T12:52:00.002-06:00

I HAAAAAAATE it when I actually agree with Michelle Malkin but in this case I think I am in lock step (or is that goose step?) with her. Apparently Lucie "Who the FUCK spells my first name like that" J. Kim is offended by a photo of Mylie Cyrus making racially insensitive faces and, as any reasonable American, she is suing for something on the order of $4 BILLION dollars. Now I do not condone Mylie's behavior in the photo but for Christ's sake, the girl is 16. She is going to do dumb things. Of course according to this article at TMZ, the Mylie's just a kid defense won't work because, "She [Kim] says it's like Paris Hilton claiming to be just a kid." Of course this is ignoring the, I believe somewhat pertinent fact, that Paris Hilton is 27 or, for those of you keeping score at home, ELEVEN years older than Mylie.

Part of me wants to rant on and on and on about this, but considering the way this week went, it is just misplaced rage, so I will just say that Lucie J. Kim please sit down and SHUT THE FUCK UP. This is exactly the sort of infantile bullshit that we don't need right now.

Thanks to Robert over at The Marmot's Hole for bringing this perfectly reasonable use of the legal system to my attention.

Random Panels - Secret Six #2

2009-02-10T02:57:00.003-06:00

While I prefer "pills" or "twig and giggle-berries" I suppose "ornament-things" works just as well.

This week's edition is brought to you courtesy of:
Gail Simone - Writer
Nicola Scott - Penciller
Doug Hazlewood - Inker

Sharks in the Water

2009-02-09T04:03:00.000-06:00

Since I can't read Magyar, I have no idea what this article is about, however I assume it is about how awesome this photograph is:

Just thought this was worth sharing!

Things I Learned Today

2009-02-08T04:07:00.000-06:00

1. There is a picture of Michael Phelps taking a hit from a bong floating around.
2. In response to this picture Kellogg has canceled his contract as a spokesfish.
3. People, presumably of the stoner bent, are trying to organize a boycott of Kellogg.
4. Kellogg manufactures something named Screaming Fruit Winders for the UK market.
5. Kellogg USED to manufacture a cereal named Puffa Puffa Rice.

My thoughts on this new knowledge:

1. WTF did you think a swimmers drug of choice would be? PCP?
2. Couldn't care less.
3. Like that crowd can organize anything for more than 10 minutes. I bet this boycott doesn't last past, oh I dunno, 5:30 pm. Right about when the munchies hit.
4. I don't care what a Screaming Fruit Winder actually is, it sounds F-I-L-T-H-Y; like Sheboygan Side-by-Side filthy.
5. Kellogg ought to bring back this cereal and have Michael Phelps be the spokesmerman for that line.

Or they could change the name to Puffa Puffa Pass cereal.

That's gold Jerry.

Hawaiian gold!

STFU Files: Joe the Plumber

2009-02-07T12:05:00.000-06:00

Okay would someone please let Joe "The Plumber" Wurzelbacher know that in this economy fifteen minutes is fifteen minutes? I know we have seven billion stations on the air which need to fill 24 hours with news, but sweet monkey Jebus, do we really need to keep hearing from this douchebag? I wanted to throw uneducated in front of douchebag but figured that someone would throw my lack of college degree back in my face so we'll just have to agree that Joe (or is it Samuel?) has all the intellectual curiosity of a gently stewed rutabaga.

To be honest the fact that he manages to remain in the public eye does not bother me as much as the fact that people seem to be taking him seriously. I mean bringing us the continuing adventures of Joe and Douchebag is one thing (although I would prefer we dedicate our precious national resoucres (read: airwaves) to the inevitable Paris Hilton v. Britney Spears v. Hillary Duff v. Christina Aguilera v. Lindsey Lohan pudding match) but inviting this guy to address the Republican Congressional leadership? Are you fucking kidding me? If this isn't the continuation of some massive piece of conservative performance art which began with the naming of Govv. Palin as Senator McCain's runningmate, then it better have been improv night at this meeting. At this point if they think Chucklehead Wurzelbacher would have anything substantive or useful to say, well, lets just say I am glad they don't have the keys to the castle any more.

Here is current media crush Rachel Maddow on the subject:

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

And here is a slightly more light-hearted take on the situation from Jon Stewart over at The Daily Show:

The Daily Show With Jon StewartM - Th 11p / 10c

Joe the Political Strategist

Daily Show Full Episodes
Funny Political Videos

Important Things With Demetri Martin
More Funny Videos

Seriously Joe, help a brother out and give our national stage back to vapid blondes babes with, ahem, talent.

Torchwood: Children of Earth Trailer

2009-02-06T11:14:00.002-06:00

I am pretty excited about this! Hopefully the series will maintain the tone of the trailer, which many have pointed out is more X-Files than Dr. Who. In my ~~humble~~ opinion that is one of the best things about the trailer. I always felt that Torchwood wanted to be The X-Files with incidental Who, and there are some episodes which rise to that level. Hopefully this series will mark the coming of age of Torchwood which, of course, means we won't get any more Torchwood after this.

The Faceless Artist

2009-02-05T09:47:00.007-06:00

Thanks to Robert over at The Marmot's Hole who pointed out this piece from the International Herald Tribune. The article is about Sun Mu, a North Korean artist who left the DPRK* in 1998 and arrived in South Korea in 2001, and how his art speaks to the Korean condition. While I found the article somewhat interesting, what really wowed me was Sun Mu's art. My tastes in art tend to run towards the more commercial art; movie posters, illustrations, and the like. This includes propaganda posters. I LOVE me some propaganda posters! One day I hope to have the scratch to pick up some vintage Soviet or WWII propaganda posters. This brings us back to Sun Mu. When he was in North Korea, his artistic training was specifically so he could paint murals and other propaganda pieces for the government and, unsurprisingly, this shows through in his work, some of which you can view at his blog.

* Why is it that communist and totalitarian regimes almost always have the word Democratic in their official names? This seems to be the same naming logic that gave us the Patriot Act and the Defense of Marriage act.

Random Panels - Wonder Woman #27

2009-01-31T12:25:00.000-06:00

Initially I had something else picked out for this edition of Random Panels, however as I was catching up on my comics reading this week I stumbled across this bit of brilliance from Wonder Woman #27. While I am not as big a fan of sound effects as some, I absolutely LOVE it when they are incorporated into the art in interesting or innovative ways and this certainly qualifies.

I also thought this would be an excellent opportunity to point out just how much I like Donna Troy's costume:

There is something about the stars being incorporated into the fabric that I really like.

This installment is brought to you by:
Gail Simone, writer
Aaron Lopresti, penciler
Matt Ryan, inker

Animated Videos 2 - Electric Boogaloo

2009-01-30T21:48:00.003-06:00

Thanks to Katy C and VH1 I have a couple of updates to my Animated Videos post from the 19th!

First up is Paula Abdul's "Opposites Attract" which topped the Billboard Hot 100 chart for three weeks back in February of 1990 and then went on to win a Grammy. Featuring an animated cat, MC Skat Kat, who was voiced by Bruce DeShazer and Marv Gunn, the song is about how despite their differences Paula and Mr. Kat are perfect for each other:

I have to admit that hearing this song brings back some memories as I was in high school at the time. For some reason I STRONGLY associate the first Paula Abdul song I can recall hearing, "Straight Up," with riding the bus to school in the mornings. Boy isn't that a pleasant memory? And even though the video is not animated, I thought I would go ahead and share it here just because I can and lets face it, if you were a teenage boy at the time odds are you had a thing for Paula:

Of course I was more of a Samantha Fox boy myself. I mean how could you be in the throes of puberty and NOT find this inspiring:

After all we have chains, dodgy dance moves, a lingerie clad female, suit pants that are too short; what's not to like?

Okay, back to the subject at hand: animated videos!

Katy C also reminded me of Dire Straits' immortal song "Money for Nothing." This is the one that I could not believe I forgot about! I do not really think anything else needs to be said about this classic:

Watch Dire Straits - Money for Nothing in Music Videos | View More Free Videos Online at Veoh.com

This brings us to the video I only saw this past week when I made it in to the gym and was able to workout during the five minutes a day when VH1 is playing music videos rather than crapping up the universe with more quasi-reality TV shows. The video for Kanye West's "Heartless":

Kanye West - Heartless (New Video) SubtitlesLyrics
Uploaded by ShanouMusik13

The rotoscoped character animation calls to mind Ralph Bakshi's work, in particular American Pop:

Of course whenever I think of Ralph Bakshi I think of his 1978 adaptation of the first half of The Lord of the Rings. One of the earliest memories I have is of my dad taking me to see that movie when we lived in Lincoln, Nebraska.

Oh well, I hope you enjoyed this rather meandering trip through some music videos. Let me know if you think of any other animated videos which are worth sharing.

Rachel Maddow and Power

2009-01-29T22:03:00.003-06:00

Last night I caught this bit on the Rachel Maddow Show on MSNBC last night:

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

While she makes the segment a little more about the stimulus package, which I think is very important, however I found her discussion about the security issue interesting. We HAVE been told that we need to worry about terrorist strikes against our infrastructure and yet there is no mass panic because, even though some people are going to be without electricity for a few weeks, this was expected. It reminded me of the Joker's speech from The Dark Knight where he talks about plans and how when things go to plan, no matter how grotesque the plan is, people don't panic. I think the example of weather-related utility failures is an even more interesting example than the ones offered up by the Joker in light of how we have been told we need to fear utility outages as a result of terrorist action.

John Williams, Aaron Copland and "Simple Gifts"

2009-01-28T23:03:00.003-06:00

One of my favorite parts of the inauguration ceremonies this past week was the performance of "Air and Simple Gifts" by the quartet of Yo-Yo Ma, Itzhak Perlman, who are two of my favorite musicians, Anthony McGill, and Gabriela Montero.

I missed the introduction of the piece and for several days thought it was just a very inventive redux of Aaron Copland's Appalachian Spring, which is one of my favorite pieces of classical music and arguably Copland's most recognizable composition after Rodeo: Hoe-down which was popularized by the National Cattleman's Beef Association "Beef: it's what's for dinner" commercials from several years back.

I just thought I would use this as an excuse to share one of my favorite performances of Appalachian Spring since I have not been able to get it out of my head since the inauguration. Performed by the Garfield Cadets, now just The Cadets, in 1987, the show below garnered the Garfield Cadets their fourth DCI championship in five years. I love how this arrangement states the major theme in a bold, brassy, in your face way about a minute in to the performance and then returns to that theme in a similar manner with a crescendo which begins at about 3:14 of the second video and then pays off in spades when the corps hits the power formation at 3:36. It blows me away EVERY time I listen.

Now without further gilding the lily and certainly no more ado, I give you part one of their performance:

And part two:

For those of you who are interested this performance is available from the DCI shop on DVD. Sadly the DCI does not seem to still have their Collector's Series of CDs in print at the moment, however I found a "Cadets of the 80s" CD on Bandgeek.com which should have this performance.

If you just want some straight Aaron Copland, I think you would be challenged to find a better recording than Copland: The Music of America which was recorded by the Cincinnati Pops Orchestra. This CD is available via Amazon or, I am certain, your online music vendor of choice, or for those of you in the Houston area I encourage you to go and hit Joel's Classical Shop on Shepherd. It is one of those local gems which we should all be supporting.

Go Forth and Waste Time

2009-01-27T09:02:00.003-06:00

Looks like I am in for a busy week both at the office and at the casa so here are some links to keep you occupied until I can get back to writing something of substance:

Now I have heard of mash-ups in the music scene (speaking of which the Best of Bootie 2008 CD is available for download here) and with movie trailers and the like, however I have NEVER heard of taking, oh, for example, a classic video game and a classic rock band, throwing them in the proverbial blender and seeing what comes out the other side but that is EXACTLY what the kids over at Shitbagz.com did. Taking the awesome that is Asteroids, a video game which I can still spend hours sucking at, and the awesome that is Van Halen, and I mean Dave "I'm Just a Gigolo" Lee Roth Van Halen and not the crap fest that was Sammy Hagar Van Halen, they have come up with Assteroidz - The Diamond Dave edition. There is really nothing else to say except go forth and play before, as Wil says, some asshat with no sense of humor serves the creators with a cease and desist.

Meanwhile over on the east coast Kevin has been experimenting with what the kids call user-generated content. First he asks his readers to come up with one-sentence pitches for existing franchises. Then he asks his readers to create a solicitation for a trade paperback collection which fills a void in the current crop of trades. Both of these comment threads are well worth reading and contain some comedy gold. And for the record I would shell out my hard earned shekels for the Hitman Omnibus, Essential Shang-Chi, and this Inspector Gadget series. Oh, and this.

While we are on the comics tip, check out this promotional clip for the soon to be taking over the world Watchmen:

I will cop to being far more excited about this movie than I should be considering I only JUST got around to reading the comics last year. So far everything I have seen and heard coming from the production crew on this movie does nothing but make me more excited to see this movie. As for it being THE unfilmable comic book? Well personally I do not buy the idea of a work being unfilmable since the very act of adapting a novel/comic/doodle in to a movie transforms the work in to something completely different. Of course there are going to be people who think Zack Snyder has failed or has done something wrong, however I am looking forward to seeing this movie and my desire to see it is divorced from whether I like the comic or not.

Now back to the salt mines!

Big Man Japan

2009-01-26T12:56:00.002-06:00

This looks truly ~~horrible~~ awesome and I hope it is coming to a theater near me!

Here is a slightly different trailer:

And here is the German trailer:

Or should that have been heer?

Random Panels - Birds of Prey #124

2009-01-24T21:17:00.000-06:00

I know! Sheesh! Personally I blame the Wachowski's, Mistah J!

This installment of Random Panels comes from Birds of Prey issue #124 "Smile for the Birdie."
Written by Tony Bedard
Pencilled by Claude St. Aubin
Inked by John Floyd

A Brief Note On "Legion"

2009-01-23T23:59:00.003-06:00

So I have spent most of the evening catching up on my watching of the television, knocking out episodes of Chuck, Star Wars: The Clone Wars, and Smallville while doing some LONG overdue maintenance on my inline skates. (ABEC-9s BITCHES!) I wanted to jot down a quick note on a moment from the 11th episode of the season, "Legion" which I believe may be a contender for F*@% YEAH status. (For more on what may constitute a F*@% YEAH moment, please consult this link and this link.) The moment starts at about the 4:15 minute mark of this clip:

Now I have to admit that I am enough of a fanboy to think that there have been a lot of cool moments in the Smallville series. I think my two favorites are the line in 5th episode of season 4, "Run," where Bart Allen says, "See if there is anyone else out there like us, maybe start, like, a club or a league or something," and the moment in the 17th episode of the 2nd season, "Rosetta," when they introduced Christopher Reeve as Dr. Virgil Swann.

For those of you who are not familiar with DC comics, Bart Allen is a kid from the 30th century who was sent back in time to Wally West who, at the time, was The Flash. Bart eventually became The Flash after Wally West disappeared with his family during the events of Infinite Crisis and is then killed by the Rogues in the final issue of The Flash: The Fastest Man Alive miniseries. Now that I have over explained that, the reason Bart, or in this case the person who we can assume one day becomes the Flash, saying something about forming a club or a league to Clark is because both Superman and The Flash are founding members of the Justice League of America. (The other original members were Batman, Wonder Woman, Green Lantern, Aquaman, and the Martian Manhunter.)

Now if I really have to explain why the introduction of Christopher Reeve was a F*@% YEAH moment, then you are clearly an idiot. I feel it is safe to say that for my generation Christopher Reeve IS Superman. In addition to Christopher Reeve's mere presence, the music in the scene starts to incorporate the theme penned by John Williams for the Superman movie. Through the scene the theme appears in the background, mostly on woodwinds if I am not mistaken, and then, just before the commercial break, it builds to a trumpet fanfare of that theme. Again I feel safe in saying that John Williams' theme for the movie helped define Superman for my generation.

Now I have a much harder time explaining, even to myself, why I think the reveal of the members of the Legion of Superheroes in "Legion" was so cool. I have never read a lot of the Legion books, although I am trying to complete my run of the Dan Abnett & Andy Lanning run which began with the Legion Lost miniseries in 2000. The Legion is something I have always thought was an EXCELLENT concept however the execution often lacked the cool factor one would want from a legion of superheroes. Originally introduced in 1958's Adventure Comics #247 when Legion memebers Saturn Girl, Lightning Boy, and Cosmic Boy travelled back in time to recruit Superboy, who was the initial inspiration for the Legion. The Legion proved to be so popular that rather than just being a one-off encounter, they started to appear in more and more stories. They became a regular feature in Adventure Comics #300 sharing space with solo Superboy stories until they displaced him entirely some years later. Of course in time the Legion was replaced, relegated to the D-list for some time until 1973 when they started receiving front cover billing once again when Superboy became Superboy starring the Legion of Super-Heroes and then, in 1980, Superboy was dropped from the title and the Legion finally had their own, self-titled book.

As I said, I really can not point to one reason why I like the reveal so much. Part of it is because I am a HUGE geek and I appreciate that the first three Legionnaires we get to meet are the original three from Adventure Comics #247. Another part of it is that as much as I will complain about how interconnected comics have become, something which can make it challenging for new readers to jump in to the mix, I do like that these things take place in a larger universe. One final reason is that for some inexplicable reason I really like the Legion's flight ring and totally want one of my own.

You can currently watch the entire "Legion" episode here on the CW's website, however since this is the only full episode they have up for Smallville, I expect that it may not be up for long.

And one final note, which is apropos of nothing, Kristen Kreuk as Lana Lang is H-O-T in this episode. As much as I love Allison Mack, I might have cheated on her a little in my mind during this episode. Sorry Allison!

Animated Videos

2009-01-19T00:34:00.002-06:00

After I posted the stop-motion animation video this past Saturday I was trying to think of different music videos which were either animated or in which animation plays a big part. The first two that spring to mind are the videos for Matthew Sweet's "Girlfriend" and A-ha's "Take On Me."

Despite being slightly more obscure, for some reason the video for Matthew Sweet's 1991 hit "Girlfriend," from the album by the same name, was the first song to occur to me when I thought up this little project.

I suspect this has to do with the animation used for the video itself; that is to say due to my love for anime, this video's use of animation from Space Adventure Cobra is more significant to me and thus more memorable. We were still four years away from the domestic release of Sailor Moon, which I consider the watershed moment for anime in the United States, and while one could find anime if one knew where to look in 1991, it was still very unusual to see anime or anime-influenced materials out in the wild that were not already familiar shows such as Robotech, Speed Racer, Battle of the Planets, and so on. On top of that, it is around this time period that I started to pay more attention to popular music, having been forbidden to listen to "the Devil's music," a restriction that seems kind of strange considering how big a fan of ABBA my mother happens to be, and Matthew Sweet's sound was distinctive enough to stand out from the other crap being played on the Top 40 radio stations to which I was listening. Hell, I still love that album almost twenty years later.

I do not know what to say about the A-ha video that has not already been said by people far more knowledgable than I. The amalgation of animation and live-action was groundbreaking in 1985 and, aside from the TRAGIC style choices, is still a very cool video today.

Ah Ha - Take On Me @ Yahoo! Video

After ruminating on this for a couple of hours, the only other animated video I could think of is the video for "Fell In Love With a Girl" by the White Stripes. I do not know why this did not occur to me sooner as it combines a pretty decent song, which is now stuck in my head, with Lego and I LOVE Lego.

And that is it, kids. I am SURE there are some animated music videos out there that I am missing. Probably some REALLY obvious ones. If you guys can think of videos I missed, leave 'em in the comments and I will do a follow-up post here in a week or two.

WTF Files - Facebook Advertising

2009-01-18T20:56:00.005-06:00

I am guessing that the combination of having my sex, male, and relationship status, single, is what drives the almost constant parade of "score dates now!!!" ads with pictures of rather well endowed young women on the right side of the Facebook display. I am willing to suffer through this as they eye-candy is about as good as it gets during the work day, although I have always been a little suspicious of whether the hotties advertised are actually available through the various sites which pimp "Hot Christian Girls," which lets face it EVERY guy reads as "Yummy Catholic School Girls-R-Us" (or is that just me?). They are a little TOO pretty and a little TOO busty for me to believe.

Now I finally have proof that my suspicious were not completely unfounded as this series of pictures appeared on my Facebook page just an hour ago:

Take a look at the girl in the center photograph. Before anything else I have to say that I would LOVE to date a chick who could pull off a form-fitting garment with such, well, curvaliciousness, and I do like the short hair, but she might look familiar to a few of you out there. No? Perhaps this picture will help you out:

Still drawing a blank? Fine, hows about this picture:

Yeah, according to the Facebook advert, the H-O-T-N-E-S-S that is Jolene Blalock, who played the Vulcan T'Pol in Enterprise, is single and Christian. I can't speak to the Christian bit; however I am pretty sure she is still married to her music exec husband, Michael Rapino. (If not, she is welcome to give me a call. I am youngish, available, willing to be a happy house-husband and I TOTALLY make her look even hotter by comparison.

I was thinking of writing something about the attractiveness of dating a Vulcan here, but when I had it done it just made me sound kind of pathetic so I think I will just leave well enough alone; although there is something attractive about dating a girl who isn't going to get all emotional on your ass.

Oh yeah, because I love you guys here is a link to a collection of Jolene Blalock galleries. Don't say I never did anything for you chuckleheads!

Random Linkbloggery and YouTubing

2009-01-17T12:34:00.000-06:00

Here is some random stuff I have stumbled across in the past week that I thought you kids might find interesting.

Wil pointed us all to the FLICKR group Growing Up Star Wars where one can add their pictures of Star Wars related shenanigans. Original triology only, please. The person who posts the first Jar Jar Binks will be summarily executed.

One of the cats over at the Star Trek Phase 2 forum pointed out these Trek motivational posters. While on the whole they are not as amusing as these motivational posters and a bit flatulence-centric even for my tastes (and that is saying something), this one, this one, and this one had me laughing till I cried. Of course here is my entry in to the realm of Star Trek motivational posters:

Then there is this bit of genius from Terry over at Bent Objects. I keep meaning to write about how much I LOVE his art but thing like YouTube and the Google machine keep distracting me. Bastards! Personally I am looking forward to his forthcoming book and have a no longer secret desire to commission the topper for my wedding cake from this guy.

Nikki shared this bit from YouTube which, I feel, truly demonstrates how I approach humor. About two minutes in this thing gets old but then by the end of the clip I found myself laughing so hard I almost peed myself:

And then, courtesy of Kevin, there is this video from Rex The Dog:

Bubblicious from Rex The Dog on Vimeo.

I really like the low tech approach to what a song which is some where on the borderlands of electronica. This also reminded me of what a friend once told me when I was pitching a stop-motion animation idea his way: "Stop-motion is something you do when your girlfriend has dropped your ass and all you can do is lock yourself in a room for six months. Normal people can't do it."

An item which is completely unrelated to anything else here. It just came to my attention that South Korea has a Ministry of Knowledge Economy. I cannot decide whether this sounds deliciously Orwellian or deliciously Stalinist, however I love the name and this it is tasty either way.

Someone should buy me this to go with my little Takeda Shingen helmet I bought when I was in Japan. Ever since I read The Samurai's Tale by Erik Christian Haugaard I have been fascinated by Japan, samurai culture, and specifically the rise and fall of Takeda Shingen. Heck, my favorite Kurosawa film, Kagemusha, deals with the aftermath of Takeda Shingen's death. If you have even the tiniest of desires to check out either the book or the movie, I can unreservedly recommend both of them and I'll let you in on a little secret; they both make me cry.

A couple of weeks ago Danny Choo of Tokyo Dance Trooper fame made a post titled "Tokyo Photo Walk 3" to his blog however since his blog is blocked by the Websense firewall at work, I only just got around to reading this post. While I love the pictures and am jealous of his mad night-photog skillz, it is the text which really spoke to me. In the text he talks about fear and not letting fear limit you, something that I struggle with every day. You ought to bop on over there and check it out. Of course clearly the guy who can do this has no fear:

Okay, I have watched this more than once since it popped up on the net and I just noticed something. After the Shibuya 109 title, right at the 1:10 mark of the video, watch the couple entering from the right of the screen. On one foot the guy has a normal shoe and but WTF is on his right foot? Also I have totally been to Hachiko crossing!

Thanks for the encouraging words and dance moves Danny!

An A Cappella Tribute to John Williams

2009-01-16T09:33:00.001-06:00

Since I am going to spend this evening at Murder By the Book checking out the talk and signing by Tim Maleeny, whose debut novel Stealing the Dragon I HIGHLY recommend, I thought I would leave you kids with this:

I do not know how in the Hell I have not posted this before now, however for the one person who reads the Opiate who might not have seen this (Hi Mom!) here it is in all of its nerd-tastic glory.

Tanked

2009-01-15T23:17:00.000-06:00

My original plan for today was to write about my plans for the year, specifically my writing plans, however I just had a phone interview for a job I *REALLY* want and I think I seriously tanked it so I am going to write about that instead.

First let me say that I HATE HATE HATE phone interviews. I like to think of myself as a pretty good interviewer, however over the phone it is very difficult to get a read on the interviewer. In this specific case every time I would finish an answer there was, what seemed to me, a long pause before the guy asked his next question. If we were in the same room I would be able to tell if he actually expected more of an answer from me or was using the time to formulate his next question. In addition I cannot tell how I am playing to the crowd, as it were.

The long pauses after my responses to his questions were not the worst part. At one point he asked what I saw as the greatest risk involved in producing electronic documents, or ESI in the parlance of the courts, and my answer was perhaps the worst answer I could have given. Part of me just watched in horror as I totally went off the rails and gave three mostly contradictory answers. There were words coming out of my mouth and I just couldn't get them to stop. Fuck, I couldn't get them to stop. It was like I had never considered the question before but I have. The risks involved in producing ESI, actually minimizing those risks, is one of the central things I do in my current job. I was so horrified at my answer that I wanted to call him back, apologize for freezing under pressure and give him my real answer. Now it is all I can think about. GAH!

My real answer, for the curious, is that in my view the largest risk with producing electronic documents in native format is that you will end up producing metadata which will be harmful to your case but somehow slipped through the review process without being noticed. This metadata would most likely take the form of tracked changes in a document. When the reviewer reviewed the document the tracked changes were not marked as being on and therefore the reviewer just viewed the final version of the document. When the document arrives at opposing counsel they notice that the tracked changes are available to view and, wisely, take a look at them. There is actually a recent case, White v. Gaceland Coll. Ctr. for Prof'l Dev. & Lifelong Learning Inc., where this very instance could have taken place. The plaintiff claimed that she was terminated in violation of the Family Medical Leave Act and, if I recall properly as I do not have my notes on the case in front of me as I write this, that there was a change made in a job description, or something like that, and that the timing of this change was important to the case. In this case it is very easy for me to envision an instance where her allegations are true however the paralegal who is reviewing the job description documents, which are kept in Microsoft Word for sake of argument, is reviewing them in Summation. The paralegal can either opt to view the document via the Summation edoc viewer (which in my opinion is a pretty piss-poor tool for native review) or via the CTRL+L option which will launch the document in its native application, in this case Microsoft Word. In the case of Summation's edoc review tool, as far as I know, there is no indication that the document has tracked changes embedded in the document therefore should the paralegal review here, and I know plenty that do, the document would be marked as relevant and as it is most likely not subject to any sort of privilege, it would eventually be produced with the metadata intact and NEVER reviewed. When it comes to trial the plaintiff's counsel, if they have caught the tracked changes, can then take apart a witness on the stand or, if the tracked changes are that central to the case, perhaps force a settlement.

Oh well, now that I have said what I really think, I think I am going to go eat my salad and sack out. No real update from me tomorrow evening as I will be at a book signing, however on Saturday I think I will post my plans for 2009.

Early Thoughts on "Amusing Ourselves to Death"

2009-01-14T21:36:00.003-06:00

One of the Christmas "traditions" that has cropped up in my family over the past decade is that books make up the VAST majority of the gifts my father gives me. This year the haul included My Boring Ass Life* by Kevin Smith, Homemade Hollywood by Clive Young, Her Majesty's Spymaster by Stephen Budiansky, How Fiction Works by yours truly**, and, finally, Amusing Ourselves to Death by Neil Postman. Despite having plowed through, and enjoyed, the first three books on the list, as well as Rivals by Bill Emmott which I HIGHLY recommend, it is the final book in this list which has really grabbed my attention.

Amusing Ourselves to Death, whose subtitle is "Public Discourse in the Age of Show Business," was originally published back in 1985. Initially when I put the book on my Amazon wish list, from whence my dad did his Christmas shopping this year about two days before I cleaned it up and added a bunch of stuff, I had no idea it had been written over two decades ago. As I read the forward to the book, which I have reproduced below, I was chilled:

We were keeping our eye on 1984. When the year came and the prophecy didn't, thoughtful Americans sang softly in praise of themselves. The roots of liberal democracy had held. Wherever else the terror had happened, we, at least, had not been visited by Orwellian nightmares.

But we had forgotten that alongside Orwell's dark vision, there was another - slightly older, slightly less well known, equally chilling: Aldus Huxley's Brave New World. Contrary to common belief even among the educated, Huxley and Orwell did not prophesy the same thing. Orwell warns that we will be overcome by an externally imposed oppression. But in Huxley's vision, no Big Brother is required to deprive people of their autonomy, maturity and history. As he saw it, people will come to love their oppression, to adore the technologies that undo their capacities to think.

What Orwell feared were those who would ban books. What Huxley feared was that there would be no reason to ban a book, for there would be no one who wanted to read one. Orwell feared those who would deprive us of information. Huxley feared those who would give us so much that we would be reduced to passivity and egoism. Orwell feared that the truth would be concealed from us. Huxley feared the truth would be drowned in a sea of irrelevance. Orwell feared we would become a captive culture, preoccupied with some equivalent of the feelies, the orgy porgy, and the centrifugal bumblepuppy. As Huxley remarked in Brave New World Revisited, the civil libertarians and rationalists who are ever on the alert to oppose tyranny "failed to take into account man's almost infinite appetite for distractions." In 1984, Huxley added, people are controlled by inflicting pain.
In Brave New World, they are controlled by inflicting pleasure. In short, Orwell feared that what we hate will ruin us. Huxley feared that what we love will ruin us.

This book is about the possibility that Huxley, not Orwell, was right.

As a consumer of HUGE quantities of media from books to movies to television, in fact Countdown with Keith Olbermann is on in the background as I write this, I find this line of reasoning rather chilling even if it goes along with something I have been thinking for some time. In essence I have felt, and may have complained about it on this blog, that for some time the public discourse in America had become painfully shrill, quite frankly was no longer civil. Of course as an alpha consumer of media I am complicit in the very thing which I decry, however I think the need to feed the 24 hour news cycle combined with the blurring of the lines between news and entertainment and the fact that the media treats consumers as though they have the attention span of a gnat has had a very negative effect on our public discourse. I am interested to see what Mister Postman has to say about this and even more interested to see what his take on it was while CNN and Headline News, then called CNN2, were still in their infancy.

Just thought I would let you guys know where my head is at in case there is a rash of meditations on modern media that end up being posted here over the next little while. I would also encourage EVERYONE out there to check this book out, despite only being about 20 pages in. I think Mr. Postman's voice and ideas are important for those of us living in the media circus world in which we live.

* This book continues my habit of buying books which consist of little more than blog posts dressed up to go to the Prom. Part of this stems from the slim hope that karmic payback might be in the offing and I can score a publishing deal at some point for all these random rantings of mine (I know I won't, but I can dream, can't I?) however the majority of the reason I continue to buy books which contain things I have already read for free on the internet is because these guys can just plain WRITE. Of particular interest in this volume is the nine-part series "Me and My Shadow" which, in the space of around 70 pages, chronicles Kevin's experiences with Jason Mewes' drug addiction. Check it out.

** This is a lie.

Most Honorable and Ancient Star Wars

2009-01-13T04:42:00.000-06:00

I haven't got the words, really, just watch and be amazed:

Found at AltJapan. Thanks Matt!

Instant Karma

2009-01-12T21:16:00.003-06:00

I can not remember which one of the multitude of role-playing games had the concept of instant karma. I believe it was the first edition of Shadowrun, however please do not hold me to that. In the game karma points are used to reward players for completing the adventure, good role-playing, and the like. These karma points could then be spent to improve the character or, in the case of instant karma, they could be spent during the course of the adventure to affect outcomes by either adding to the result of a die-roll or allowing the player to re-roll the attempt.

Sunday I got to see what I can only classify as instant karma in action.

I was hauling my butt over to Best Buy in order to engage in a little retail therapy. They were having a sale on a couple of DVD sets I wanted to buy (the 7th season of Smallville and the 1st season of Chuck) and, after thoroughly enjoying my weekend at Oni-con and finding myself laughing out loud at the first episode of Ouran High School Host Club (which can be viewed for free on the Funimation website), I decided it was time to delve back into anime and with the demise of Planet Anime, Best Buy seemed like the best place to go. It was with these thoughts of commerce in mind that I headed out. I generally do not use the freeways unless I am under a serious time constraint or my objective is truly the other side of town. This is not done out of a desire to avoid traffic or anything but rather because I really enjoy driving through the neighborhoods and shopping districts that are around my house. On this particular day I decided to take Binz/Bissonnet down to Buffalo Speedway before cutting over to Richmond. As I was heading up Buffalo Speedway and crossing the south-bound feeder for 59 some douche bag in a jacked-up pickup truck turned from the feeder onto Buffalo Speedway, cutting across two or three lanes of traffic and cutting me off, causing me to have to hop on the brakes.

At about the same time I hopped on the brakes, I hopped on the horn and gave the aforementioned douche bag The Bird.

Douchebaggins, as we shall now call this person, stomped on the gas and accelerated away from me, only to get caught at the light at Richmond where, as fate would have it, we were both turning left. My favorite cock-hobbit once again swung across all the lanes of traffic in order to beat everyone (read: no one) in to the far right lane. As we approached the light at Edloe, El SkiDouche was pulling the douchiest of maneuvers and riding in two lanes. Apparently unsatisfied with just the far right lane he felt the need to ride MOSTLY in his lane and a little in the lane to his left. There was a little swerving involved here as well which, had the vehicle in question NOT been a lifted-to-the-heavens truck, might have indicated the driver was trying to decide whether to stay in the right lane and get stuck in the line of traffic which was waiting at the red light or get in the left lane and skip around said traffic.

I could only watch in amusement as Herr Doktor Douche (of the Long Island Douches, I believe) started to slow just an INSTANT before he slammed in to the rear end of a car waiting at the red light. As I drove past, three lanes to the left, I saw bits and pieces of lights and bumpers spread across the ground and the douche shaking his head after it bounced off the airbag which had, I can only think, violently deployed and pimp slapped him into wakefulness/sobriety.

Now I can not tell you the number of times I have been driving, seen some no talent ass clown driving like this and wished that I was some sort of undercover or off-duty cop so I could drop a little bit of F-U into their lives for being a bad person and in my impotent rage I often think of how nice it would be to see this person get theirs, as it were but this is the only time I can think of where I have had the honor AND privilege to see karma in action*. Only later did two very important things occur to me. First, while karma might have gotten El Douche, the person/s in the other car may have just been innocent bystanders AND odds are that the truck did FAR more damage to the car than the car did to the truck. Second, by relishing the moment I am just tempting fate and that cannot be a good thing. Oh well.

* I have heard a couple of very good stories about karmic payback being a bitch, one of which involves this guy, V, his tent, a friend of mine who shall remain nameless and a WILDLY inappropriate menage a trios.

High Kick Girl Trailer

2009-01-11T16:49:00.000-06:00

This has been making the rounds on the internet for a little while now however it is too perfect not to share:

I will pose to you the same question Chris Sims, noted face kickery expert, posed to me:

Best movie ever?

Half Man, Half Sausage

2009-01-10T23:55:00.000-06:00

So the other night I was watching An Evening with Kevin Smith 2: Evening Harder and then the guy pictured with the mic asked, "If you were half man, half sausage which way 'round would you have it and why?"

The only reason I wanted to post this, besides being a BRILLIANT fucking question which I am going to have to unleash on someone at a Q&A (I suspect it might be Barry Eisler on his next book tour), is because of the look on this guy's face:

It struck me as being some where between "I can't believe he asked that" and "fucker stole my question." This thought amused me and I thought I would share with the world.

Best Christmas Post EVER.

2009-01-09T13:03:00.001-06:00

Read it and weep for all the holiday joy it contains. Seriously.

God Goes in to a Pub

2009-01-08T14:02:00.001-06:00

Thanks to Norm over at onegoodmove.com.

Kitumba Teaser Poster Released

2009-01-03T00:53:00.000-06:00

Some months ago it was announced that the next episode of Star Trek Phase 2 to go before the camera was going to be John Meredyth Lucas' "Kitumba" which is a Klingon-centric script which centers around the Enterprise travelling to the Klingon home system on a secret mission. You can read a very brief synopsis of the script at Memory Alpha and a much longer one in the now out-of-print Star Trek: Phase II - The Making of the Lost Series, a book which is a fascinating read even without the episode synopsis'. The production team has released the teaser poster created by Jeff Hayes of PlasmaFire Graphics and I thought I would share with you:

You can d/l an approximately 8.5X11 version of the poster here.

This Morning

2009-01-02T10:04:00.003-06:00

This was the view from my bedroom this morning:

I love being in the mountains!

I Can't Think of Anything to Add

2009-01-01T00:49:00.003-06:00

From here.

Rain Fall Trailer is Here

2008-12-31T15:41:00.004-06:00

Finally the trailer for the forthcoming Rain Fall movie, based on the excellent debut novel by Barry Eisler has hit the net. You can peep it at the official movie site.

I am of two minds about this movie. I am a little concerned that the production seems to be primarily a Japanese production as I feel this will make any stateside release a fairly limited affair. On the other hand I am glad this is a Japanese production. While the main character, John Rain, is half-anglo, he had plastic surgery in order to appear more Japanese and therefore it only makes sense that a Japanese actor be cast to play him. The list of Japanese actors who are even somewhat familiar to U.S. audiences is fairly slim. Ken Watanabe springs to mind immediately due to his parts in "The Last Samurai," "Batman Begins," and "Letters from Iwo Jima." After that the only names that spring to mind are Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa, whose most memorable role to me came in 1993's "Rising Sun," and Ken Takakura who would be most familiar to American audiences as either Uchiyama, the manager of the Dragons in "Mr. Baseball" or the Japanese cop Masahiro in "Black Rain." As much as I love Takakura's performances in these movies and keep meaning to track down some of his Japanese films, at the age of 77 he might be a little too old to plain John Rain. While John Rain is no spring chicken, he is deadly in hand-to-hand combat and a P-I-M-P to boot so I have trouble seeing Takakura in this role.

Beyond casting concerns there is the question of language. John Rain is Japanese as are the VAST majority of the supporting characters in this first novel. To my mind they need to be speaking Japanese to one another rather than English. I know that due to my long-running anime fandom I am FAR more comfortable with subtitles than probably 95% of the general movie-going public, but to have Japanese characters speaking English to one another always creates a disconnect for me. I think one of the best things about "Letters From Iwo Jima" was the fact that the movie was shot using spoken Japanese.

Anyway, that is quite enough from me. Regardless of who made the flick I am excited to see the trailer and hoping that this will get some sort of release stateside.

"Enemy: Starfleet" Teaser

2008-12-28T23:33:00.003-06:00

Here is a quick teaser scene from the forthcoming Phase 2 episode "Enemy: Starfleet"

This is the episode I was fortunate enough to work on this past June and I am SOOO looking forward to seeing the final product!

In this bit Alersa is played by BarBara Luna. While I was on-set I had the unique privilege of being Luna's (she insists we call her Luna) assistant for the duration of her stay. One of the very first things I did after I was assigned as Luna's PA was run lines with her. This was the scene we were reading through and it was very difficult for me to keep a straight face when I came to the line, "Call me...Jim." I also had to fight the urge to Shatner the line up. Doesn't it just beg for a Shatner-esque delivery?

Super Drunken Christmas

2008-12-25T10:46:00.001-06:00

Honestly, I can not think of many better ways to spend it!

This is from Rocket K, a Japanese punk band I recently discovered due to their cover of The Buggles new wave hit "Video Killed the Radio Star." Sadly the only place I can find their video for that is on their MySpace page and I am having trouble accessing MySpace at the moment. In stead of that let me offer you these:

First, the original video in all of its circa 1979 glory:

Second, a video from the Ethermusic festival in 2005 of Jon Bernhardt performing "Video Killed the Radio Star" on a theremin:

Mmmmm. Theremins are the musical equivalent of bacon; they make everything better!

I hope you're having a Merry Christmas and enjoying whatever makes you happy!

Chrsitmas Gifts from Me to You

2008-12-24T10:20:00.003-06:00

Look! I got you a couple of things for Christmas!

Now what could possibly top an entire CHANNEL on YouTube dedicated to all the crunchy goodness that is Monty Python, you ask?

Well, my friends, only this:

That's right! George Lucas' magnum opus is now available to view FOR FREE on Hulu. Isn't this the bestest Christmas EVER!

Star Trek: Phase 2 Update - 12-22-08

2008-12-22T12:49:00.002-06:00

The Phase 2 team has finally released the first part of "Blood and Fire" to the general public. I had the opportunity to see a rough cut of this episode when I was on set this summer and as much as I enjoyed the episode then, I REALLY enjoyed watching the final cut after I downloaded it last night.

You can access the official download page here. This has several download options available.
Here is Anthony Pascale's review on TrekMovie.com. The review is spoileriffic and this continues in the comments.

This episode has generated quite a bit on controversy in fandom due to the inclusion of gay crewmen and I have to say that while I did find the scene between Peter and Alex a little too long, I know it pays off in part two of the episode. And the bloodworms? Ewwwww.

In other Phase 2 news, they released an official DVD ISO for their third episode, "World Enough and Time" which features the return of George Takei to the role of Hikaru Sulu. Written by Michael Reaves and Marc Scott Zicree, the script was nominated for the SFWA Nebula award, a nomination which caused some controversy (you can read more about that here). Additionally the episode was nominated for a Hugo award and won the T.V. Guide Online Video award beating out such professionally produced shows as the BSG webisodes. In the beginning Phase 2 would release high-quality DVD ISOs of the episodes for download however there was a problem with people d/l'ing the episodes and then selling DVDs at cons. Since this practice could put the agreement between Phase 2 and CBS/Paramount the powers that be at Phase 2 decided to stop releasing the DVD-quality ISOs. This is a pleasant return to days of yore and one that I hope is here to stay.

You can access the official download page here.

"With or Without?"

2008-12-19T14:34:00.002-06:00

I had no idea this existed until the main Marmot himself posted about his brother's screenplay ending up on the list.

Congratulations Kevin!

I have to say that the summary of Kevin's screenplay, "The Phantom Limb," sounds rather interesting:

A troubled private detective uncovers a blackmail scam involving a gangster who
runs a brothel that caters to amputee fetishes (and other taboo sexual
interests) and the doctor who performs the body modifications.

Sounds like my favorite bit from "Romeo is Bleeding" taken to the extreme. And when I said interesting I mean truly messed up in ways that only the best 1970's neo-noir stories can be. I really hope this ends up making it to the screen.

In addition to "The Phantom Limb" there are a shit-ton of other movies on this list. Here are some of the titles that jumped out at me as being either worthy project or in need of a little mocking:

"Inglorious Bastards" - Quentin Tarantino + World War 2? YES PLEASE!

"Galahad" - I am a sucker for anything having to do with Arthurian Legend.
"Fierce Invalids Home From Hot Climates" - Apparently this is based on a book which could not possibly be as good as the movie I am seeing in my head right
now. A possible sequel title? "Fierce With Pigs" in which the main characters
set out to violate their strict Hebrew upbrining by eating bacon.

"Roundtable" - Comicdom's Brian K. Vaughn + Arthurian legend? Mmm, mmm good.

"The Amazing Adventures of the Monogamous Duck" - Who gives a flying rat's ass what this is about, the title alone is worth the price of admission.

"The Gary Coleman - Emmanuel Lewis Project" - I know this is supposed to be a place-holder title however I REALLY think they need to leave this as the title
for the film. I like to think of it as the Alan Parson's Project for the new
Willenium.

"Your Dreams Suck" - Nothing to say here except ain't that the truth?

"47 Ronin" - I am happy that this particular story is getting remade for a more
mainstream audience although I suspect this will have trouble living up to the
example set by "Chushingura" however I have heard that this is being
envisioned as a Keanu Reeves vehicle. Really? Please don't. Seriously.

"Samurai" - Sticking with the whole Japanese theme this sounds like it could be
fun. Hope it is done as well as this year's "The Forbidden Kingdom."

"Untitled Channing Tatum Project" - Okay from time to time these untitled
projects have unintentionally funny names, for example see the Gary
Coleman-Emmanuel Lewis entry above, however most of the time JUST ASSIGN A DAMN TITLE TO THE PROJECT.

House Cleaning

2008-12-16T11:07:00.002-06:00

I have been needing to make some changes around here for some time but have never really managed to do it for some reason. (Read: Because I am lazy.) Over the next few days I am going to be trying a couple of different templates as well as cleaning up all the crap on the right side of the blog.

KANEDA!

2008-12-15T14:32:00.001-06:00

Thanks Wil!

Consequences of Gay Marriage

2008-11-24T10:05:00.001-06:00

more music charts

From graphjam.com via Wil Wheaton.

Blood and Fire Trailer

2008-11-20T12:32:00.003-06:00

The Star Trek: Phase 2 crew has finally set a release date for the first part of their next episode Blood and Fire. The script for Blood and Fire, of BaF as it is referred to, was originally written by David Gerrold* for Star Trek: The Next Generation however TPTB decided that certain facets of the story were too controversial for Star Trek and thus the script was never produced. The Blood and Fire script lensed by Phase 2 was significantly expanded and altered to set the story in Kirk's time and take advantage of the expanded cast present in the Phase 2 world. I had the privilege of watching rough cuts of both parts of BaF and you are in for a treat when part 1 hits on December 20th. Here is the trailer for part 1 of David Gerrold's Blood and Fire:

For more about this episode you can check out these links:

Here is a selection of behind the scenes photos from the shoot.

Here is a report on the showing of the rough cut at the Shore Leave convention in July.

Here is a link where you can download the first four minutes of the episode.

* David Gerrold is best known in Trekkie circles as the author of the classic episode The Trouble with Tribbles however his award-winning novella The Martian Child hit the big screen as a feature starring John Cusack last year. I HIGHLY recommend The Martian Child. At least the movie, I have yet to read the book.

So there I was...

2008-11-16T23:11:00.003-06:00

...walking back to my building from hitting the ATM and getting a salad at the Post Oak Grill when I noticed the big sign at the end of the hallway just before you enter my building had changed. At some point in the not to distant past it had been changed from something promoting the El Paso volunteerism program called "Sharing Team El Paso" to a promotional display for our corporate wellness program called "Choose Well." In fact it was changed to this graphic:

Being the self-centered twit I am, I could not help but notice that center picture inset at the bottom. Here it is, enhanced for your viewing pleasure:

Mother of god. There I am.

Back in January had you told me by the end of the year I would be on some promotional material promoting a wellness and fitness program in any other capacity than "Don't be this fat fuck," I would have told you that you were clearly insane and have suspected that Rob and Scott were plotting something. Here we are a year later and I have gone from tubby bitch to this:

Yeah, I still don't get it either.

On this subject it has been some time since I posted about my diet and this seems as good a as time as any to mention that I have met my goal of loosing 100 pounds, actually 102 as of last Friday. It feels awesome to have actually accomplished this and I will admit that when I stepped off the scale on Friday I had to sit down and have a little bit of a cry.

The Morning After

2008-11-05T10:51:00.003-06:00

So one of my friends posted this as her status line on Facebook not too long after the election was called for Oabama:

...decides to brush up on her marxist theology in preparation for January, comrades.

Now I understand not liking Obama for his politics however no one has been able to successfully explain to me how anything Obama has said or done is any more socialist than what the Bush administration has actually done in the past month?

Please explain in the comments and use small words as I am apparently quite daft.

Before you go I would like to point out a couple of thoughts and data point which you may wish to consider:

1. From the OH SNAP! Department comes Alan Mendelowitz's bon mot which he dropped at the New America Foundation's forum Confronting Economic Meltdown. "The Bush administration, which took office as social conservatives, is now leaving as conservative socialists." Allan Mendelowitz is a member of the BoD and former chairman of the Federal Housing Finance Board, a former executive director of the U.S. Trade Deficit Review Commission, and a former executive vice president of the Export-Import Bank of the United States. I suspect he knows whereof he speaks.

2. Adam Smith, in his seminal work on economics Wealth of Nations said:

The necessaries of life occasion the great expense of the poor. They find it difficult to get food, and the greater part of their little revenue is spent in getting it. The luxuries and vanities of life occasion the principal expense of the rich, and a magnificent house embellishes and sets off to the best advantage all the other luxuries and vanities which they possess. A tax upon house-rents, therefore, would in general fall heaviest upon the rich; and in this sort of inequality there would not, perhaps, be anything very unreasonable. It is not very unreasonable that the rich should contribute to the public expense, not only in proportion to their revenue, but something more than in that proportion. (Book 5, Chapter 2, page 14)

Was Adam Smith, cited by many as the father of modern economics, a socialist? Here he is clearly championing the same sort of "redistribution of the wealth" championed by President-elect Obama. Before you answer I would take the time to read the balance of Smith's magnum opus.

3. Inevitably someone is going to bring up the 2001 interview Barack Obama did with Chicago public radio in which he used the phrase "redistributive change" and makes clear that he endorses the redistribution of wealth by the government. Before you do I would go and read this piece by David Bernstein who concludes that, "Barack Obama is undoubtedly liberal, and his background is in political community organizing in poor communities. Is it supposed to be a great revelation that Obama would like to see wealth more "fairly" distributed than it is currently?" And the goes on to ask:

It's true that most Americans, when asked by pollsters, think that it's emphatically not the government's job to redistribute wealth. But are people so stupid as to not recognize that when politicians talk about a "right to health care," or "equalizing educational opportunities," or "making the rich pay a fair share of taxes," or "ensuring that all Americans have the means to go to college," and so forth and so on, that they are advocating the redistribution of wealth? Is it okay for a politician to talk about the redistribution of wealth only so long as you don't actually use phrases such as "redistribution" or "spreading the wealth," in which case he suddenly becomes "socialist"?

Now I can understand if you are of a Libertarian bent and feel that ANY tax is a plan by the dirty commies to crap up your free market paradise and you need not weigh in here, but for those of you that think SOME taxes are a good thing, and I will assume this is most of my audience as I think most of you like police protection, the military, roads, and, hey, even getting to vote. (If you don't like these things then I would hope you can at least see the need for them.)

So have you ever...

2008-11-03T13:37:00.003-06:00

...gotten so drunk you woke up in an alternate universe?*

I thought everything was fine but apparently I was wrong. Surely this could not happen in the dimension I call home. Heads of the American Nazi Party and the White Aryan Resistance** want Obama to win? Good God, I expect to meet myself any minute. The worst part about this is I did not even get drunk this weekend as far as I can remember. I did run into Flash (Ahhhahhhh! He'll save every one of us!) Friday night as well as Spank Me Elmo. Perhaps this is where I went wrong.

Edit: Guess what I just found via, oddly enough, one of the Korean blogs I read? A CafePress store where one can purchase Rednecks for Obama swag. I knew this election could represent a paradigm shift but clearly I have once again under-estimated my fellow man.

* BONUS QUESTION: Is this a question only a depressingly nerdy person would ask?

** So I know the White Aryan Resistance was going for the acronym WAR however I find it a little silly to have White in the title. Is it modifying Aryan? In this case isn't it a given that Aryan is going to mean white? I doubt there is a Black Aryan Resistance (BAR), Chinese Arayn Resistance (CAR), or Yellow Aryan Resistance (YAR, aka Piradical).

I knew Japanese baseball was different...

2008-10-24T18:14:00.002-05:00

...but I had NO idea how different!

Okay, that clip might be a bit misleading. While I was in Tokyo I had to opportunity to attend a Yomirui Giants (aka. Tokyo Giants) game where they played the Hanshin Tigers. My friend is a life-long Tigers fan and thus we sat in the Hanshin section. It was an awesome experience and I HIGHLY recommend you attending a game if you are ever in Japan and have the opportunity. The Hanshin fans make Red Sox fans look down right sedate:

I have to say as much fun as the Hanshin fans can be, the best part of the game has to be the beer vendors. Much like at any sporting even here in the States there are people who are tasked with wandering the stands selling refreshments. Unlike ANY sporting event I have attended here, the vendors selling beer were all women:

Very attractive young women. With mini-kegs of beer on their back so EVERY beer is a draught beer. Japan, why are you so awesome?

And just to ruin things for you, here is you humble host enjoying the game:

As always you can click on the images to kaiju-size them.

Word of the Week - Precondition

2008-10-23T16:20:00.005-05:00

pre-con-di-tion

-noun
1. Something that must come before or is necessary to a subsequent result; condition: a precondition for a promotion.
-verb
2. to subject (a person or thing) to a special treatment in preparation for a subsequent experience, process, test, etc.: to precondition a surface to receive paint.

From Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)

I bring this up because of this exchange (~~which takes place beginning at about 5:14 of the embedded video below~~): (Well since I can't get the damned embedding thing to work you will just have to check out the video here at Onegoodmove.org. Sorry about that.)

Williams: Gov. Palin yesterday you tied this notion of an early test to the new president with this notion of preconditions that you both have been hammering the Obama campaign on. First of all what, in your mind, is a precondition?

Palin: You have to have some diplomatic strategy going in to a meeting with someone like Ahmadinejad or Kim Jong-Il one of these dictators that would seek to destroy America or her allies. It is so naive and so dangerous for a presidential candidate to just proclaim that they would be willing to sit down with a leader like Ahmadinejad and just talk about the problems, the issues that are facing them. So that's some ill-preparedness right there.

What Palin* is refering to is Obama's oft repeated willingness to meet with leaders with whom the U.S. is at odds without preconditions to the meeting. This first came up during the Democratic primary races, specifically at the YouTube/CNN debate on July 23rd, 2007 where Stephen Sorta asked:

In 1982, Anwar Sadat traveled to Israel, a trip that resulted in a peace agreement that has lasted ever since. In the spirit of that type of bold leadership, would you be willing to meet separately, without precondition, during the first year of your administration, in Washington or anywhere else, with the leaders of Iran, Syria, Venezuela, Cuba and North Korea, in order to bridge the gap that divides our countries?

Obama responded:

I would. And the reason is this, that the notion that somehow not talking to countries is punishment to them -- which has been the guiding diplomatic principle of this administration -- is ridiculous. Now, Ronald Reagan and
Democratic presidents like JFK constantly spoke to Soviet Union at a time when Ronald Reagan called them an evil empire. And the reason is because they understood that we may not trust them and they may pose an extraordinary danger to this country, but we had the obligation to find areas where we can potentially move forward.

I would like to think that it is clear to any rational human being that Obama, should he become President, would not meet with these people without having any sort of diplomatic strategy. The mere suggestion of that is so, pardon my French, fucking silly that it boggles the mind that someone would even suggest it. Of course any meetings with the leaders would be only one part of a larger diplomatic initiative. What Obama meant is that he wants to get away from the tactic we have been employing in the Bush years of flat-out refusing to talk to people until they give in to our demands, something Iran is going to now attempt. At that point what is the point of even talking with them? We have gotten what we want and they have given up everything. It is a wonderful negotiating tactic when it works and one I engage in on occasion, however when it does not work one of two things happens. Either there are no negotiations or the party which made the demand and then backed off begins at a disadvantage, having already essentially lost one round.

It would bother me that the Republican ticket still tries to make hay out of this whenever they are given the opportunity, and I am fully aware that Brian Williams opened this door for Palin and there is a world of difference between that and bringing it up during campaign stops, however in this case Palin again demonstrated her, to use her phrase, ill-preparedness for assuming the office for which she is, according to a shrinking number of Republicans, qualified.

It also makes me smile that one could, were one of the mind, to turn this around and point out, as McCain has attempted to do with Obama, perhaps Palin does not know the difference between strategy and tactics. The short version being that preconditions, or lack thereof, is a tactic used in a diplomatic strategy.

* I am still trying to get to a Plain/pale in comparison joke but it is not working out well.

Star(t) Trekkin'

2008-10-17T11:42:00.000-05:00

Over the last few weeks the Paramount publicity machine has been indicating that the veil of secrecy surrounding the JJ Abrams helmed re-boot/imaging/wtf-ever-we're-not-calling-it-this-week of Star Trek was going to begin to slip a little. All this is being done in order to build up to the release of the first full trailer for the movie which is going to be attached to the new Bond flick hitting theaters November 7th. (This news has moved the Bond flick from the "maybe I'll make it to the theater to see this movie" to "I guess I'll go either Saturday or Sunday." I am also hoping there will be a Rain Fall trailer attached to the movie but I suspect that is still going to be a Japan-only thing for a while.) The first major step in peeling back the veil was a release of several pictures to several different websites including UGO, AICN and TrekMovie.com. The second step was a cover story in the issue of Entertainment Weekly which should be hitting the stands today.

I think we all know what is really going to happen as this veil is pulled back for the fans.

That's right.

Let's get ready to RAMPAGE!

Okay, maybe there was too much build up here because I really just want to cut to the chase. I thought it would take a little time for a fan to go for the most obscure canon complaint possible. Boy howdy was I wrong. It took less than a day for someone to go FTW on this one; and I quote, "I just realized, doesn’t Captain Kirk have hazel eyes? Did they decide he didn’t look good with contacts on."

I was hoping to have a little fun with this but seriously? Four comments in and we're already talking about the color of Kirk's eyes? Oh Trek fandom how I underestimated your powers. I promise it will never happen again.

Also, for the record, I am TOTALLY looking forward to this movie and am firmly planted in the, "Let's wait and see how it is before we get the torches and pitchforks," camp.

At the car wash...

2008-09-02T15:26:00.003-05:00

...whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Well now THAT song is stuck in my head and I have no one to blame but myself but I am sure if I work at it I can dig up and ex-girlfriend or something to blame.

The more sane amongst you might be wondering just what in the hell would make me think about that song. Well, mon ami's, it is this video. (Which I cannot seem to embed right now so you'll just have to click through to view the most glorious thing you will see this month.) Come back here once you have viewed the video.

Now that we're all back in our seats let's talk about the "Inverse Ninja Theory" which states the effectiveness of ninjas is inversely proportional to the number of ninjas present, or to put it in less ~~tortured~~ questioned using enhanced interrogation techniques English, the more ninjas present the more they suck. Because I am a sad man who has FAR too much time to wonder about these things I have always wondered what would happen if you put said ninjas on roller-skates what would happen to the equation. Now I am finally able to solve for x.

And x equals AWESOME.

(As a somewhat interesting aside the music in the above clip comes from Mike Oldfield's Ommadawn. My uncle made a dub of this album for me back in the late '80s and I listened to the tape until it broke however I never knew the artist. One night I was watching a "classic" porno, the title of which escapes me at the moment, and heard this music. Through the powers of the internets I was able to track down the title and artist and have subsequently added the CD to my collection. And my mom said nothing good could come from watching porn.)

Pondering Comic-buying Habits

2008-08-29T14:38:00.002-05:00

I find myself at an intersection of a couple of different issues and I am not 100% sure where I am going to comedown on this so I thought I would ponder “out loud” to the crowd and see what comes of said pondering.

I have recently found an online ordering service for the comic books and various other items advertised in the monthlyDiamond Previews catalog. This service offers discounts on comics ordered through them that range from 30% to 75% withthe majority of what I would order on a regular basis being around 40%. There are also discounts on the othermerchandise listed which varies greatly.

It will come as no surprise to you guys that I read comics but I think you might be shocked at the amount of money Idrop each time I visit the comic book shop. While Nan’s offers me a 10% discount on comics and supplies the additionalsavings I can see from this online service is a huge incentive to go with them. To illustrate how much of an incentivelets look at the order I put together for October:

$389.15 is what my order would cost if I pay full retail price however this includes several things which I would notnormally buy so lets cut it down to just the comic books and trade paperbacks I would purchase. Removing themiscellaneous items brings the full retail total down to $226.83. At Nan’s I would get a 10% discount against thistotal (22.68) so I would be paying $204.15 before tax. Tax on this total is $16.84 which brings me to $220.99 by thetime I am walking out of the door.

Compare that to my total of $254.46 for the entire order (including the $162.32 of merchandise and supplies I removedfrom the calculation above) with shipping.

In a purely economic sense there is no question that I should be using the online service however there are otherconsiderations which have me feeling a bit guilty for my decision to use this service.

As a general rule I prefer to support local merchants rather than big chains or internet vendors even if I end up payinga bit more at said local merchant. I value the relationships one can build by becoming a regular. If the people aregood at what they do then they will learn your tastes and be able to recommend other authors/artists/movies/cigars/scotchthat might interest you and just not be on your radar. You loose some of this when dealing with people via the internetbut the bigger picture is that I think local businesses are valuable to the community and if I do not support them thenthey will go away only to be supplanted by the Walmarts and Borders of the world.

This decision is made a little easier because Nan’s is not actually my first choice for comic stores in the Houston area. If they had better hours or a more convenient location I would prefer to shop at Bedrock City Comics. The storesthemselves are brighter, more pleasant places and the personnel have always been very friendly and helpful even thoughI am not a regular. By contrast the customer service at Nan’s is about what one would expect from a bunch of insularcomic nerds. I like the guys well enough and can chat with them now, but I had to earn that right with my, lets behonest here, not terribly hard earned cash. (On the flip side of that, I do share an office with Brian so…)

Oh well I think I have wandered off-point here pretty well however I have pretty much done away with any guilt I hadover dropping Nan’s like a bad habit and embracing the internet. I hear it is the way of the future. And in COMPLETELYunrelated news which is probably only of interest to Rob and Lapp the most recent issue of Blue Beetle features a weaponwhich bears the warning : POSSIBLE THEOLOGICAL IMPLICATIONS.

God I love comic books.

BOOK REVIEW - Paths of Glory

2008-07-13T22:25:00.003-05:00

Paths of Glory: The Life and Death of General James Wolfe
Stephen Brumwell
McGill-Queen's University Press, 2006
406 pages

I find it curious that General James Wolfe languishes in relative obscurity in comparison to the manner of his death and what he accomplished in his astonishingly short life. In a military career that spanned 19 of his 32 years he rose from a 'volunteer', that is a young teen serving with a regiment in the hopes of improving his prospects for a career in the military, to Major General and commander of the British assault on Quebec (modern day Quebec City), the main British thrust in 1759. Wolfe's victory on the Plains of Abraham enabled the British to assault Montreal the following year and drive the French out of Canada. One can argue that Wolfe's victory at Quebec laid the groundwork for the troubles which led to the American Revolution a scant sixteen years later.

Wolfe began his career in the British army when the fortunes and popularity of 'Thomas Lobster', or redcoat, were at their lowest. As there was no standing police force in the early 1700's the army was often called in to quell riots and the like and thus the British soldier was not popular with the populace. Added to this was the stunning lack of success the army appeared to have, particularly when compared to the navy which, it seemed, could do no wrong. By the time Wolfe fell the worm had turned and the British soldier was well on his way to being the respected professional that springs to mind when one hears the word Redcoat.

This being the case one has to wonder why so few people know the name James Wolfe. I took an informal poll of my friends and associates and while a few knew the name and that he did something important, only one or two were able to properly place him in time and space. According to Brumwell's introduction, "Wolfe's current reputation provides a sorry contrast to the one he enjoyed a century ago." While the majority of what had been written through the end of the 1700's and all of the 1800's about Wolfe was laudatory, in the 1900's opinion in academia began to swing in the other direction. Some of this, as Brumwell observes, was an unsurprising backlash against the saccharine nature of the earlier works on Wolfe where he was capable of doing now wrong. However as is too often the case what should have been a minor adjustment towards a more reality based view of Wolfe became, in some quarters, a wholesale crusade to demonize the man and portray him as "...unpleasantly vain, smug and humorless." These efforts even went so far as to question Wolfe's military genius with some concluding that he was most assuredly not a great general and that his particular cultural life after death was due purely to the circumstances of his death.

It is in this historical landscape that Brumwell asks how Wolfe can be as celebrated as he was in death without first having already enjoyed a good reputation amongst his peers and countrymen before his death. As stated by Brumwell the central question of the work is, "Does Wolfe's fame rest upon the circumstances surrounding a single dramatic and significant victory, or is there a deeper explanation for his great contemporary reputation?"

Brumwell goes on to explore Wolfe's life and the world in which he lived in a very lively book which I found compulsively readable. I highly recommend this book to anyone with even a passing interest in history.

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 18

2008-06-06T21:52:00.001-05:00

So it was with great joy and rejoicing that two weeks ago I was able to report that I was below my target weight of 250 pounds however unlike certain politicians I did not want to prematurely declare “Mission Accomplished.”* As with all of my waypoints during this diet thing I wanted to be at or below the goal weight for two weeks before declaring victory. Well, guess what time it is? (No, it is not time to get ‘ill’.)

Tipping the scales at an almost petite by comparison 244 pounds this morning means it is time for me to declare victory! Sadly this will not involve me landing a plane on a carrier deck, either literally or euphemistically. I have dropped a total of 76 pounds since February 1st and, for the mathematically challenged out there (I’m looking at you, Scott) I am only 24 pounds away from hitting 220 pounds. Early on I discussed 220 as possibly being a goal but I wanted to take a wait and see attitude towards the whole thing since dieting and I do not have a particularly happy history together. (Kinda like me and the ladies but with even less nookie, if that can be believed.) Now I am pretty firmly set on getting down to 220 pounds before my birthday. Of course this is going to have to wait until I get back from Star Trek camp.

Oddly enough I really don’t have too much to say about this except that I appreciate all of the support I have gotten from you guys over the past four months while I was getting here. It means more to me than I could ever say. Thanks!

* I know it was just that one time and that they say it happens to everybody, but the joke is still there and never let it be said that I won’t go for the low hanging fruit.**

** That might be the gayest thing I have said/typed in a while.

Friday - 5-30-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
(2) Nature Valley Oats-n-Honey granola bars
Chips, queso and salsa
Chicken fried steak with gravy
Mashed potatoes
Garlic bread
Brownie with ice cream and chocolate sauce
60 minutes on the elliptical

Saturday - 5-31-08
The Drink
1 bottle of Odwalla Vanilla Al'Mondo protein drink
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, turkey, ham and Ranch
Twizzlers
(3) glasses of wine
Garlic bread
Pasta Pescatore
German chocolate cake
Glass of whisky
Walked 4+ miles

Sunday - 6-1-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
Large popcorn
A pint of Guinness
Muffaleta
Pasta salad

Monday - 6-2-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Medium salad with chicken chunks, bacon, Mandarin orange slices, apple chunks, crutons, raisins and Honey Mustard dressing
Amy's Mexican Casserole Bowl
Twizzlers
60 minutes on the elliptical

Tuesday - 6-3-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Fried Alligator
Iced tea (no sugar)
Dirty Rice
Citrus Glazed Shrimp
Yoplait yogurt
60 minutes on elliptical

Wednesday - 5-28-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Tuna Salad Sandwich
Small bag of Ruffles
Chocolate Chip Cookie
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
60 minutes on elliptical

Thursday - 5-29-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Large nachos with cheese, beans, beef and jalapenos
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
60 minutes on elliptical

Fat Fuck v. Food - Week 17

2008-05-30T23:02:00.000-05:00

I weighed in at 247 pounds this week and don't really have too much to say about it, for once. Right now I am just looking forward to weighing in next Friday. I expect to continue to be below 250 pounds and thus able to declare this phase of my weight loss plan done with. For shits and grins here is a chart of my weight loss per week:

Friday - 5-23-08
The Drink
Yoplait yogurt
Bottle of chocolate milk
Sausage, cheese and egg sandwich on toast
Bacon Cheeseburger
Fries
Tazo Giant Peach Green Tea
2 egg rolls
3 chocolate chip cookies
4 Ironically delicious Cuba Libres
2 soft chicken tacos
Regular order of steak fajita nachos
45 minutes on the elliptical

Saturday - 5-24-08
The Drink
Yoplait yogurt
1 can of Coke
5 pieces of large Papa Johns Spicy Italian pizza
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
Walked 4+ miles

Sunday - 5-25-08
The Drink
Yoplait yogurt
3 pieces of large Papa Johns Spicy Italian pizza
Chips and salsa
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
90+ minutes ice skating

Monday - 5-26-08
The Drink
Yoplait yogurt
Chips and salsa
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch

Tuesday - 5-27-08
The Drink
Yoplait yogurt
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
Chocolate chip cookie
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
1 bottle Odwalla Vanilla Al'Mondo protein drink
60 minutes on elliptical

Wednesday - 5-28-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Medium salad with crutons, chicken chunks, bacon, mandarin orange slices, almonds, apple chunks, raisins and honey mustard dressing
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
60 minutes on elliptical

Thursday - 5-29-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Large nachos with cheese, beans, beef and jalapenos
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
60 minutes on elliptical

Fat Fuck v. Food - Week 16

2008-05-23T22:36:00.000-05:00

So this morning I stepped on the scale and it read 248.4 pounds.* For the first time that I can remember I am below 250 pounds. Also, I am done with this whole diet thing until I get back from Star Trek camp. Of course that is a bit of a lie since I am not going to officially declare victory until I have been either at or below 250 pounds for two consecutive weigh-ins. Ok, maybe it is more than just a bit of a lie as I am not going to change my eating habits that much. I am comfortable doing what I am doing, however I will be less strict with myself and actually start enjoying nacho day in the cafeteria again rather than just being surly on Thursdays.

Anyways, here is the progress I have made since beginning this back on February 1st:

Starting weight: 320 pounds
Current weight: 248.4 pounds
Total weight loss: 71.6 pounds

Elapsed time: 112 days

Beginning waist: 48
Current waist: 40

It is kind of funny, somehow I was expecting to feel different once I hit this goal. A sense of accomplishment, perhaps, or a sense of jubilation but that really came along with the photo comparison I shared this past week. This is not to say that I do not feel a sense of accomplishment, because I do, but I was just expecting something more this morning when the scale told me I was done. Of course since I had some serious stress in the office yesterday and ended up having bad work dreams because of it, I am kind of just worn out today so that could be contributing to the lack of umph in the morning.

Oh well, the one thing I am excited about today is my reward. There is a cigar in my box with the magical words Habana, Cuba on the band that has been waiting for this day. I think tonight I am going to Hemingway it up with the cigar and an ironically delicious Cuba Libre. That should just about hit the spot.

* I actually had a joke here about the scale asking me who the hell I was but it was SO not working that I decided not to try and force it. In shrinking I think I have grown.

Friday - 5-16-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Banana
Mr. Brown's Iced Coffee
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
CLIF Banana Nut Bread bar
Yoplait yogurt
1/2 order of nachos
Chili Cheeseburger
Fries
Iced tea (no sugar)
Fuck off HUGE dessert with ice cream and whipped cream
45 minutes on elliptical
60 minutes of ice skating

Saturday - 5-17-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Large salad with roast chicken
3 dinner rolls
A metric ass load of food including pulled pork tacos, brisket, and corn pudding
Iced tea (no sugar)
Walked 4+ miles

Sunday - 5-18-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Large salad with chicken and parmesan dressing
Bowl of chili
Whataburger with cheese and bacon
2 large fries
60 minutes ice sakting

Monday - 5-19-08
The Drink
Dannon Activia Light yogurt
Large salad with crutons, chicken chunks, raisins, mandarin orange slices, almonds, and honey mustard dressing
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
60 minutes on elliptical

Tuesday - 5-20-08*
The Drink
Yoplait yogurt
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
Chocolate chip cookie
60 minutes on elliptical

Wednesday - 5-21-08
The Drink
Yoplait yogurt
Cup of Crab Bisque
Bread
Salad with fried chicken strips, tortilla strips, and honey mustard dressing
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
60 minutes on elliptical

Thursday - 5-22-08*
The Drink
Yoplait yogurt
1 serv. Metamucil
Medium salad with crutons, chicken chunks, bacon, almonds, mandarin orange slices, raisins and honey mustard dressing.
60 minutes on elliptical

*I swear I had dinner both Tuesday and Thursday night but for some reason I did not write what I ate down in the diary. Wierd.

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 15

2008-05-16T21:18:00.000-05:00

ARGH! 1.6 pounds! 1.6 LOUSY FREAKIN' POUNDS! Is all...that remains to be lost before I hit my goal of 250 pounds. I lost five pounds this past week and after the jackassery surrounding my eating this weekend, it being Mother's Day and all, I am surprised as the next guy. (Well, maybe the cat two seats over.) This is a little bit of a lie. Due to the eating jackassery from this weekend I did four things this week to help my weight loss along. First I pushed my workout on the elliptical to a full hour on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. 45 minutes was not ragging me out like it had back at the beginning of April so I thought it was time for me to make the next jump. I went ahead and only did 45 minutes today because I am not planning on blowing things out of the water food-wise this weekend AND I am planning on going ice skating for an hour or two tonight. Second I decided to go ahead and try something I have been contemplating for a while; I ate nothing but salads for my meals this week. I made sure to include chicken, turkey, or ham with each salad so I was getting a dose of protein at each meal. As I said this is something I have wanted to try for a while just to see how my body reacts and I have to say that I did not like it. For the most part I was okay however I found myself very tired in the evenings and hitting the sack around 10pm, which is just CRAZY early for me plus I had some headache and occasional vertigo issues when I stood up too fast. Clearly that was a bad plan. The third thing I did was drop the shot of Metamucil from my morning routine. I think it is better for all of us that we observe a "the less said about this the better" moment here. The fourth and final thing I did was give the Dannon Activia yogurts a try in the morning instead of the Yoplaits I have been eating since I started this crazy thing. I actually like the consistency of the Dannon yogurt a bit better and, while I am not a calorie Nazi it is something I am aware of, they have about 30 less calories per serving so I may replace the Yoplaits with the Dannon full-time as soon as I plow through the Yoplait back-stock I have in the fridge.

Now for the future. I am really expecting to be down to 250 or below by this time next week and some people have suggested I start thinking about what I need to do to maintain my weight. Since this has been so easy and I have broken the 20% loss plane without plateauing (I am SO tempting the fates with this statement) I am going to go ahead and shoot for 220 pounds. My goal date for this is going to be October 1st and I am going to start seriously working towards this goal once I return from the Star Trek shoot (or Nerdvana as I have started to refer to it) in early July. Once I get back from that I am going to consult with one of the trainers at my gym and try to design a program that is going to continue to promote weight loss while increasing my upper body strength. I want to play ice hockey this fall and will need to replace the mass I used to use to push people around with muscles in order to properly goon it up. Until then I am going to keep doing what I am doing right now and I am going to do my best to be good over the shoot, however the exigencies of filming being what they are I am not TOO confident about my ability to continue losing weight while I am in New York.

Oh well, this has run on FAR longer than necessary! Apparently I am in a chatty mood today. One last thing. The new pants I bought about a month ago? Now they are too big and that? That is awesome.

Friday - 5-9-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Bottle of chocolate milk
Sausage, egg, and cheese snadwich
Chicken Teriyaki
Rice
Boiled Cabbage
2 Egg Rolls
Tazo Giant Peach Tea
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and Ranch
4 Peanut Butter Twix bars
45 minutes on elliptical

Saturday - 5-10-08
The Drink
1 serv. Fiber One Raisin Bran Clusters
1% Milk
Gyro
Small fruit smoothie
1 bottle Snapple Peach Mangosteen
Fried Calamari
Fried Mozarella
Small Caesar salad
Bow-tie pasts with chicken, mushrooms, and cream sauce
Cinnamon Apples with Ice Cream
Walked around the Ren Faire for 3+ hours

Sunday - 5-11-08
The Drink
1 serv. Fiber One Raisin Bran Clusters
1% Milk
Steak
Potato Salad
Deviled Eggs
Fruit Salad
Angel Food Cake
Whipped Cream
Nature Valley Peanut Sweet & Salty Nut Granola Bar

Monday - 5-12-08
The Drink
1 Dannon Activia yogurt
Large spinach and romaine salad with mandarin orange slices, raisins, apple chunks, almonds, chicken chunks, bacon and honey mustard dressing
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
45 minutes on elliptical

Tuesday - 5-13-08
The Drink
1 Dannon Activia yogurt
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
1 chocolate chip cookie
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
60 minutes on elliptical

Wednesday - 5-14-08
The Drink
1 Dannon Activia yogurt
Iced tea (no sugar)
Large salad with chicken, avocado, bacon, olives and Ranch
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
60 minutes on elliptical

Thursday - 5-15-08
The Drink
1 Dannon Activia yogurt
Iced tea (no sugar)
Large salad with chicken, avocado, bacon, olives and Ranch
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
1 Clif Chocolate Brownie Bar
60 minutes on elliptical

John Edwards Thinks I Am Right

2008-05-09T14:59:00.001-05:00

(And I don't mean right wing, either.)

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 14

2008-05-09T14:48:00.001-05:00

So freakin' close I can TASTE it! (That might be an unfortunate turn of phrase but there it is.) I weighed in at 256.6 pounds this morning. On the somewhat annoying side the loss of only 2.8 pounds represents the smallest weekly loss I have had since I started this back at the beginning of February, however the flip side of that is that I am still loosing weight despite messing up a little this week. The part of me that is a bit of a, well, I can't really say that here on network TV wants to be bummed about this. To some degree I feel like I failed this week, however to get that out of my head all I have to do is look at what I have done so far. 63.4 pounds in 14 weeks is some pretty decent progress.

I had something funny happen to me the other day which I thought I would relate. I get a salad for lunch from the same place pretty much every day. While the salads are not great, they are just the right size and it takes me almost no time to zip down and get them as the place is in the basement of my building. Apparently my weight loss has been the subject of discussion for the past few weeks. Yesterday I went and ordered a fresh salad rather than just grabbing a prepackaged salad, which is what I do probably 99% of the time. While the young lady was making the salad we talked a little about what I was doing to loose weight. Then the other two young ladies who were working starting asking the girl I was speaking with some questions. They were speaking in Spanish. I speak menu and bar Spanish but nothing really beyond what I need to order food or find a bathroom. I did understand the one thing the girl with whom I was speaking kept saying and that was "I don't know." Finally one of the other girls broke down and asked me how much I had lost. I told them I was down 60 pounds since the beginning of February. This led to a little more discussion and then my salad was done and I took off. One of the paralegals came by my desk a little later and told me that they were still talking about me about 10 minutes later.

Oh well, back to the trenchs!

Friday - 5-2-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 bottle of chocolate milk
Sausage, egg, and cheese sandwich on toast
2 donuts
Space club sandwich
Fries
Bacon cheese fries
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
1/2 order of nachos
Chicken tortilla soup
45 minutes on the elliptical
60 minutes ice skating

Saturday - 5-3-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 serv. Whey protein
2 serv. Kefir
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and Ranch
6 pieces of sushi
California roll
Hawaii roll
Spider roll
5 piece of gyoza
Iced tea (no sugar)
Large popcorn
2 Nature Valley Honey-n-Oat granola bars
Walked 4+ miles

Sunday - 5-4-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 serv. Whey protein
2 serv. Kefir
1 pint Guinness
Medium Spicy Italian pizza
Walked 6.5 miles

Monday - 5-5-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 biscuit
Large spinach and romain salad with raisins, mandarin orange slices, bacon, chicken chunks, almonds, crutons, and honey mustard.
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
2 Nature Valley Honey-n-Oat granola bars
45 minutes on the elliptical

Tuesday - 5-6-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
11.5 oz V8
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and Ranch
2 tortillas
1/2 blueberry bagel
Kimchi stew
Rice
45 minutes on the elliptical

Wednesday - 5-7-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
1/2 Apple turnover thingy
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
Kimchi stew
Rice
Med. Sprite
popcorn
Walked 1 mile
45 minutes on the elliptical

Thursday - 5-8-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Med. spinach and romain salad with raisins, mandarin orange slices, bacon, chicken chunks, almonds, crutons, and honey mustard
Hard-boiled egg
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
45 minutes on the elliptical
Walked 4+ miles

Scatter-brained

2008-05-08T15:21:00.001-05:00

I have been pretty scatter-brained of late however there are a couple of things I have seen today I feel are worthy of comment.

Gas Tax Holiday = Idiocy
The whole concept of a gas tax holiday sounds like a terrible plan. I am saying this as a person who just bought a rather fuel-hungry vehicle and plan on putting somewhere between 3,000 and 4,000 miles on it right when the proposed tax holidays would be in effect. Clearly it is in my best interest in the short term for the gas tax holiday to happen however I think the negative long term effect of the holiday will FAR out weigh any positives (which I think would be minimal anyways.)

The biggest problem I see with the gas tax holiday is that by lowering prices you are going to increase demand of an already scarce resource. I believe the current high in oil prices are due to several factors including increased demand from developing nations such as China and India, a weakening dollar, and the fact we operate in a very narrow margin of consumption versus refining capacity. (While there may be some douchebaggery in the prices charged by the companies I believe this is a smaller percentage of the recent price increases than these fundamental supply versus demand issues.) This narrow margin is what concerns me. There is already an increase in demand during the summer along with a commensurate increase in prices. What the proposed holiday will do is decrease the price without bringing any more supply to the market. The decrease in prices will most likely lead to an additional increase in demand which will then lead to an increase in the base price. It is not out of the realm of possibility for the entire difference made in dropping the gas tax will be figured into the price by the end of the holiday therefore making gas more expensive in the long run.

Another down side to the tax holiday is that we will be tacking on an additional God only knows how much to the national debt. We have spent the last eight years under an administration who, rather than tax and spend, has cut taxes and increased spending. This has led us to the current issues we have with the weak dollar which contributes to the high gas prices we are currently seeing. We do not need to incur additional national debt at this point. The other option would be to cut back on programs which the gas tax funds, however as I understand it these are mostly programs which fix up things like the road on which you damn Earth-hating suburbanites feel the need to drive. Seems like increasing the usage of these resources while cutting their funding, while a very conservative move, is not a good plan.

I won't even go in to some of the issues mentioned in this New York Times article, such as hording and the tax break not actually figuring in to the final price at the pump (I typed pimp).

I guess I want your take away* from this to be that the idea of a gas tax holiday is political pandering in the short term and a recipe for even more problems in the future. I would much rather see politicians discussing long term solutions to this issue as well as more consumers making better decisions regarding energy consumption.**

Another Shot at Hillary
I have a HUGE amount of respect for Wil Wheaton and find myself nodding my head at many of his points, however now I feel the need to pick on him a little due to this post, which I think illustrates a larger problem in today's Democratic Party. I agree that the race for the Democratic nomination is over and, in the interest of full disclosure and all that, I have been backing Obama from the start. (Hell when I saw Obama speak at the Democratic National Convention back in 2004(?) I knew I would be voting for him as soon as he was in a race where I had a vote.) I even agree with the people who are calling for Hillary to bow out at this point, what I cannot agree with is the tone with which some of the calls are being made.

Whether she is staying in, and there by prolonging, the race due to her ego or because she truly believes she is the better candidate is immaterial. I happen to think she honestly believes she is the better candidate and, again with the full disclosure, I admit to having an irrational dislike of Hillary. Something about her just bugs me and thus I am prone to think of her actions in the worst possible light. This line of thinking seems to run contrary to the majority of Obamites I am reading online who are ascribing Hillary's endurance to her, apparently Holmesian***, ego.

What I mean to address is the tone of the comments coming from the Obama side of things. Rather than being magnanimous and gracious they have become just as full of venom and as destructive as the attacks which we Obamites claim to hate. Wheaton's recent post contains a more restrained species of this vitriol however the post he links to, "Hillary Clinton: The Psycho Ex-Girlfriend of the Democratic Party" is just the sort of thing I am talking about. While I may agree with the sentiment expressed, wish Hillary would get out of the race so we can start to heal as a party, and think the post is funny as hell, I am concerned that all these sorts of things are doing is making it more difficult for us to come back together as a party. Some posts go even further and leave me wondering if somehow the right wing blogosphere has switched sides, just as ~~professional dillweed~~ Rush Limbaugh encouraged the voters to do in recent primaries.

Hillary will get out of the race when she is ready to get out of the race. What us Obamites need to concentrate on is being gracious in victory, and not in a condescending way, either. In some ways I am surprised at how divisive this primary has turned out. While there are differences between the two platforms, I suspect many of these differences will be washed out by the construction of a national party platform over the coming months and then further washed out over the ensuing four years as the President works with Congress to enact this platform.

Oh well, I have wandered off my original point which was I do not like the tone of the Obama side of things right now. I think this tone is representative of the worst face of politics today and I expected better from us. At least when talking about other Democrats. If you want to bag on that wishy-washy douchebag John McCain then have it. (But not his service. Regardless of whether I think he is right or wrong, his record of service to this nation is an example to which we ALL should aspire.)

(As a WAY tangential aside I wonder why I refer to Obama by his last name and Hillary by her first name. The first justification was that there are two Clintons in the public eye and thus I have to use her personal name to identify her. That is just hogwash as contextual clues, such as feminine pronouns, should almost immediately clue the reader in and if you can not pick up on those then I am surprised you have stayed at this particular party for ANY length of time.)

* Fuck yes I just used a buzz word. Bite me.

** And before you try and pull my card on the sort of car I drive you better remember the following: I have used public transportation to get to and from work every day for the past year and plan to continue to do so for at least the next twelve months. For the last five months I have not owned a car AT ALL and only rented one when my list of chores got to be large enough that I could justify having a car for the weekend. I walk to the grocery store, book store, comic book store, and some bars these days so I am doing my part.

*** This is, in fact, a penis joke and not a Sherlock joke.

Thunderbird is GO!

2008-05-04T23:30:00.003-05:00

I spent last weekend in Galveston photographing the Lone Star Flight Museum's annual Spirit of Flight airshow. The crap weather which greeted me Saturday morning turned into a beautiful afternoon. You can click on the photo to view my Flickr photoset from the airshow:

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 13

2008-05-02T23:53:00.000-05:00

Lucky week 13. And let me tell you after the Munching of Weight Destruction I did this weekend in Galveston I thought I was not going to loose any weight this week. Fortunately for everyone I was WRONG! I dropped another 3.6 pounds this week which takes me down past the 260 point to 259.4 pounds. That is a total loss of 60.6 pounds or 18.9375% of my starting weight. Most importantly this leaves me with just over 9 pounds left to loose before I hit 250.

I rewarded myself with a couple of donuts and a thing of chocolate milk this morning and even though it was crap Schepps chocolate milk it was the BEST chocolate milk I have EVER tasted. It tasted like victory. The result of my reward is that I am so jumped up on sugar right now I can hardly type, let alone think straight.

As always we thank you for your support. (Although I guess I should stop referring to myself in the plural.)

Friday - 4-25-08
The Drink
1.5 serv. Kefir
1 serv. Whey protein
1 serv. Metamucil
Wendy's triple cheeseburger
2 large fries
Sprite
Black Bean soup
Bread
More fried stuff than you can shake a Heidi at
Iced tea (no sugar)
45 minutes on elliptical

Saturday - 4-26-08
The Drink
Orange Juice
Hashbrowns
Cinnamon Roll
2 eggs, scrambled
2 sausage pattys
2 hot dogs
Bacon cheeseburger
Waffle fries
Iced tea (no sugar)
Pecan pie dipped in chocolate

Sunday - 4-27-08
The Drink
Orange Juice
Hashbrowns
2 eggs, scrambled
2 sausage pattys
3 slices of bacon
3 pancakes
1 Tazo Giant Peach Green Tea
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 serv. fat free chocolate pudding
Beff fajita nachos
2 soft chicken tacos
Walked 4+ miles

Monday - 4-28-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, turkey, ham, and Ranch
1/4 box Fried Rice Chicken Helper
Asparagus
1 serv. fat free chocolate pudding
45 minutes on elliptical

Tuesday - 4-29-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Small salad
4 pieces goyza
6 pieces of sushi
California roll
Iced tea (no sugar)
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, turkey, ham, and Ranch
45 minutes on elliptical

Wednesday - 4-30-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, turkey, ham and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
1/4 box Fried Rice Chicken Helper
Asparagus
45 minutes on elliptical

Thursday - 5-1-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Large spinach and romaine salad with raisins, mandarin orange slices, almonds, bacon, apple chunks, chicken chunks, and honey mustard dressing.
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
45 minutes on elliptical

Waffle House is ON NOTICE!

2008-04-29T23:15:00.002-05:00

I REALLY like me some Waffle House breakfast food. While it is not the Kettle Breakfast o' Doom* which I would consume during my exile to College Station, the Waffle House does serve up some tasty, tasty foods. Thus I make it a point to eat breakfast there at least once when I am in Galveston for breakfast. As I usually stay in the Super 8 right behind the Waffle House this presents no problem and due to proximity I will usually eat breakfast there both days. This past weekend I ended up in the Sandpiper Motel which feels like it is at the far end of the island, and therefore I only made it in for breakfast on Sunday. They are usually pretty busy on Sunday so I went ahead and took a book with me to read while I waited. When I got to the Casa de Waffle there were only two groups of people ahead of me. "Awesome," I thought, "there should not be much of a wait." I settled into a chair, which, as it turns out was right next to the LARGEST WOMAN I HAVE EVER SEEN (and I do not mean large good but rather large holy crap that's a lot of chubby). She was at the jukebox complaining about the lack of Patsy Kline when I walked in which is why I had no idea I would end up next to her. It being Galveston she was also in her bathing suit and ~~a King sized sheet~~ sarong (And boy was it wrong). SHUDDER This was almost enough to put me off my feed however it is completely not part of the rant so lets get back on point, shall we?

So I sit down and start reading my book (Summer Knight by Jim Butcher for those of you who care about these things) and as I predicted the two groups are quickly seated. I glance around and note that there are a few people who look like they might be leaving shortly and I am next up. Three chuckleheads walk in. One of the parties leaves and the rather portly black lady who was working the floor (boy howdy does that sound wrong) said she was going to bus the table and, "…then I can seat y'all." This should have been my first warning sign however I am an elitist pig and took no notice of her use of a plural when it was clear I was not plural. She bussed the table. As she approached us, they were standing a little in front of me an to the left, I closed my book and stood, only to watch in amazement as she seated the chuckleheads. What the fuck? I literally stood rooted to the spot for a second in disbelief with my mouth open. I was already headed towards the door when she indicated she was ready to seat me. I told her not to worry about it as I was going to go somewhere else. There was then an exchange about me sitting at the counter, which I HATE doing as the stools are not built for someone of my height leaving me VERY uncomfortable, and I pointed out to her that I was leaving because she had decided to seat the chuckleheads before me. Her response was, "They were here before you." To which I replied, "No, they weren't." (My mind added, "I've been sitting here since you seated the family of Patsy Kline loving cetaceans over there." But I did not say this because I am a nice guy and that would just be rude.) She responds with, "Well you should have told me." To which I responded with nothing but a look of utter disbelief. I did not, and do not, have to words to express how dumb of a statement this was, to my mind. YOU, Aunt Jemima, are supposed to be the highly trained food service commando here and keeping track of which person was there first is pretty basic stuff. On top of that you had already said good morning to me when you seated the dwarf star to be sitting at the four-top over there. I don't like doing the job I get paid for (this is purely on principal because I am a tortured artist and stuff) I am sure as heck not going to do your job for you!

Then, as I walk out, the cherry on top of everything else, is Mrs. Butterworth wishing me a blessed day as I leave. Oh HELL no! You do not get to assuage any guilt you might feel about being a complete fucktard when it comes to doing your, lets face it here people, incredibly simple job by being all Christian and wishing I have a blessed day. It was all I could do to stop from turning around on her and telling her exactly where she could stick her blessed day in exacting and excruciating biological detail. I walked out and went to the Dutch Kettle** instead.

Now under normal circumstances this would not have ticked me off so much however in this case there were three things going on:

The last time I was in this Waffle House the exact same thing happened except that I took it like a good consumer and did not fuss.
I had taken my supplements about 30 minutes earlier. If I do not get food on top of them in about 30 minutes I get a little twitchy and irritable.
I was already having a bit of a crap day as I was fighting dust and crap on my camera's sensor and I could not get it clean.

The end result of all this is I am drafting a letter to the manager of that particular restaurant because when I am pissed writing letters makes me feel better AND I will never go in to that Waffle House again. Which saddens me to some degree because I REALLY like Waffle House.

Here is the text of the letter I sent this morning:

April 29, 2008

Waffle House
2825.5 A 61st Street
Galveston, TX
77550

To Whom It May Concern:

I am writing to inform you of a situation I encountered in your restaurant this past weekend which has forced me to decide that I will no longer patronize your establishment. Now before I go into the specifics I want to say that I very much enjoy the food and atmosphere at all of the Waffle Houses I have ever been in. So much so that when ever I am in Galveston I make it a point to have at least one meal at your restaurant. Invariably, in the past, the staff has been professional and friendly, even on days where they are swamped.

This brings us to what happened this past Sunday. I arrived at the restaurant sometime after 10 in the morning. I brought a book with me as I have been in this particular restaurant on Sunday morning before and had a bit of a wait. I certainly do not mind waiting to be seated at restaurants, particularly ones that I quite like, but I thought I would go ahead and be entertained rather than just stare at the walls. There were two groups already waiting when I arrived and they were quickly seated. While I was waiting for another place to open up a group of three young men entered. As soon as a table opened up the hostess seated them, completely ignoring me. I am 6’3” and over 250 pounds so I am not easily overlooked or lost in a crowd. I had closed my book and was in the process of standing when the hostess approached the group so, to give her the benefit of the doubt we might assume she thought I was part of the group. I was absolutely stunned as this EXACT thing happened to me the last time I was in your establishment.

To be honest I was so surprised by this happening again that it took me a couple of moments to collect my wits. I informed the hostess, who was now attempting to seat me, not to bother as I would be going somewhere else for breakfast. When asked why I told her my reason to which she responded that they had, in fact, arrived before me. Once again I was caught off-guard as the hostess had acknowledged my presence after she had sat the two groups which were waiting before my arrival. At this point I should have just left however one of my character flaws is that I feel the need to have the last word. I, very politely considering the circumstances, pointed out that they had not arrived before me. At this point a simple apology would have sufficed. Had the hostess just admitted she made a mistake everything would have been fine but rather than do this she informed me that it was somehow my responsibility to inform her that they had not arrived before me. At this point I left. I was already hungry when I arrived and did not have a rational response to her idea that the customers are supposed to police themselves. In a perfect world this idea has merit, however as we have all been on the road with our fellow man I think we know in practice this devolves to foolish optimism.

I have never worked in food service however I have had several close friends who have, up to and including being the general manager of several restaurants, therefore I do have some understanding of stress under which wait staff operate. I am willing to give the benefit of the doubt in most cases. There are so many things which can go wrong and are completely out of their control. I understand this and am willing to overlook quite a bit however what I do not tolerate is poor service. I have now experienced what I would consider VERY poor service at your establishment twice in my last two visits.

Once is a mistake. Once in a while is a mistake. Twice in a row is something else entirely. The first time I just took it like a good consumer, operating under the assumption that it was a mistake. After all it was Sunday morning and the place was busy. The second time? Something else entirely. If your restaurant has a policy of seating groups before individuals during peak hours then the hostess should explain the policy to me. At which point I can make my decision on whether to stay or be treated as a second-class citizen. I think it is pretty clear what would happen had this been this case. Regardless of the cause for the poor treatment, the fact remains that on my last two visits to your restaurant I have received very shoddy treatment and therefore I will no longer be patronizing your establishment.

Sincerely yours,

I sent a copy to the corporate headquarters as well. I will let you know what, if any, response I receive.

* The Kettle Breakfast o' Doom (tm) is an omlette with American cheese, bacon, ham, and chili, an order of hash browns, three pancakes, and an order of corned beef hash. No, I have no illusions about why I am overweight, why do you ask?

** The Dutch Kettle was okay.

LOLJamez

2008-04-28T23:14:00.000-05:00

I has a problem.

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 12

2008-04-25T23:07:00.002-05:00

I almost forgot what week I am on. Heck, I might have messed it up anyways. Enough blathering, lets get down it, shall we?

This morning I was tipping the scales at 263 pounds which is a loss of 3.6 pounds over the past week AND a total loss of 57 pounds. Just when I typed that it hit me how much weight I have actually lost. I find myself having those moments here and there. For example yesterday as I was getting back in my work clothes after my workout and shower I caught a glimpse of myself out of the corner of my eye. I was wearing some khakis I purchased last weekend (more on that in a minute), a shirt I really like, and I had just gotten my hair cut on Monday. The first thought that came in to my mind was, “Damn. I look GOOD.” I cannot tell you how long it has been since I have felt that way about my reflection in a mirror. As a general rule I HATE full-length mirrors because they do a great heaping amount of damage to my self-image. The person I saw in the mirror was SO not the James that I see in my head. (The James I see in my head is, well, I think this just about sums it up (NSFW for language) ) I’m still not there yet but this is the first time I have not had to work myself up to thinking I look good.

Now about the pants. One of the things I had to do last week was pick up some new pants. I had put this little shopping trip off for as long as I could but it was finally time. Even with a belt I would have to walk around with a hand in my pocket to prevent any Chick Magnet-esque incidents. Most of my pants were a 46 waist. ALL of the pants I bought were 42’s with the exception of one pair of 40’s. While I fit into the 40’s they were a little more constricting than I like my pants and the pockets on a couple of the khakis I tried on stuck out as pockets are wont to do when the pants are just a little too small. I can’t remember the last time I bought something smaller than a 44 so this felt awesome. In fact it felt so awesome I bought more pants than I planned. This morning as I was getting dressed after my workout I noticed something about the 42’s I chose to wear this morning. There is already a little play in the waistline and I need to wear a belt with them. Damn that was fast.

I know I had something else I wanted to share. Oh yeah! A couple of the ladies in the office have called me out on loosing weight. The manner in which they have brought it up just cracks me up because they are so nice and circumspect about it and concerned that I might be offended that they noticed. These couple of instances have really provided a boost!

Now as it is the end of April, well the last weigh-in day for the month anyways, it is time to set my goals for May. I once again succeeded in meeting my goals for the month, the high goal to be down to 265 or below. For May my goal is to hit 250 pounds and be done with this phase. I have five Fridays in May with which to work. Since I only need to loose 13 pounds to get to my goal this means that I can only loose 3 pounds each week and still make my goal and 3 pounds is still below my average weight loss per week so I think this is very doable.

Again thanks for all your support and putting up with this stuff! I REALLY appreciate it more than I can say.

Friday - 4-18-08
The Drink
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 serv. Metamucil
1 serv. Kefir
1 serv. Whey protein
3 peices of a large Papa Johns Spicy Italian pizza
1/2 order of cheese sticks
Chips and queso
2 beef and bean burritos
Refried beans
Rice
Iced tea (no sugar)
45 minutes on the elliptical

Saturday - 4-19-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
2 serv. Kefir
1 serv. Whey protein
Egg & Bacon kolache
Sausage & cheese kolache
Lemonade
Bacon Cheeseburger
Fries
1 serv. fat free chocolate pudding
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
Medium salad with chicken chunks and ranch
1 piece of a large Papa Johns Spicy Italian pizza
Helped Don move

Sunday - 4-20-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
4 pieces of a large Papa Johns Spicy Italian pizza
Tazo Giant Peach Green Tea
1 serv. fat free chocolate pudding
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ceaser dressing

Monday - 4-21-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
11.5 oz. V8
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and Ranch
1 bottle Tsing Tao beer
General Tso's Chicken
Egg Drop Soup
Rice
45 minutes on the elliptical

Tuesday - 4-22-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
11.5 oz V8
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and Ranch
1/4 box Fried Rice Chicken Helper
Asparagus
1 serv. fat free chocolate pudding
45 minutes on elliptical

Wednesday - 4-23-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and Ranch
11.5 oz V8
1/4 box Fried Rice Chicken Helper
Asparagus
1 serv. fat free chocolate pudding
45 minutes on elliptical

Thursday - 4-24-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
2 Tuna salad sandwiches
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz V8
45 minutes on elliptical

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 11

2008-04-18T21:48:00.000-05:00

Man I just don't know how to start this week's entry in the Shrinking Tales of a Shrinking James. Since I passed the 50 pound mark this week I wanted to make some Hawaii 5-0 jokes but I just can't make any of them work. Of course it doesn't help that I keep getting Hawaii 5-0 and Magnum P.I. confused in my head. Oh well. Let's just get to this week's report, shall we?

In an interesting turn of events I am concerned that I might have lost TOO much weight last week when I dropped 5.2 pounds. This brings my weight down to 266.4 pounds and puts my total weight loss at 53.6 pounds. In addition to passing the 50 pound mark this week I also dropped below 267.5 pounds, which means I am more than three-quarters of the way to 250. In fact I only have 16.4 pounds to go!!

One of the tasks I have this weekend is to go shopping for some new pants. I am to the point where all of the pants I currently own are too large, almost clownishly so. I can't carry my wallet, iPod, and cellphone in my pockets without keeping on hand in another pocket to ensure things do not go south on me. Even the 44's I have are too big and I cannot remember the last time I went shopping for pants that were smaller than a 44 waist. This is pretty exciting stuff!

Friday - 4-11-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Banana
1 can Cherry Coke
5 slices of large Papa Johns Spicy Italian Pizza
Cheese Sticks
Med. Salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
45 minutes on elliptical.

Saturday - 4-12-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
3 Tacos Pastor
1 Taco Barbacoa
Med. Salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
3 slices of large Papa Johns Spicy Italian Pizza
1 piece Angel Food cake with whipped cream and berries
6 hours of yard work.

Sunday - 4-13-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
2 serv. Kefir
1 serv. Whey protein
4 Jack-in-the-Box tacos
1 piece Angel Food cake with whipped cream and berries
Med. Salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
7 hours of yard work.

Monday - 4-14-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Med. Salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
1/4 box Chicken Jambalaya Chicken Helper
Asparagus
45 minutes on the elliptical
Walked 4+ miles

Tuesday - 4-15-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Med. Salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, turkey, ham and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
1/4 box Chicken Jambalaya Chicken Helper
Asparagus
45 minutes on the elliptical
Walked 3+ miles

Wednesday - 4-16-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Small Greek Salad
Dinner Roll
1/2 chicken breast
1/4 box Chicken Jambalaya Chicken Helper
Asparagus
45 minutes on the elliptical

Thursday - 4-17-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Med. Salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
Beef and Vegetable Soup
45 minutes on the elliptical

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 10

2008-04-11T09:43:00.003-05:00

You know how you discerning folks know how its Friday? Because Friday is Fat Git update day! (And there was much rejoicing.)

For some reason I am having trouble getting rolling on this email today. I don't know why because I still have nothing to report except good news. I lost 4 pounds over the last week which brings me down to 271.6 pounds and puts my total loss at 48.4 pounds since I started this thing in February.

Since I am a big nerd I went ahead and did the hated maths to figure out the following (by "did the hated maths" I mean wrote the simple Excel formulas to figures this stuff out):

1. This is an average loss of 4.15 pounds per week. This ignores the first two weeks I posted losses. I believe the 9.2 pounds and 6 pounds I lost those weeks were statistical anomalies and would throw the number off.

2. The 48.4 pounds I have lost represents 15.13% of my starting weight of 320 pounds.

3. As of this week I have lost 69.14% (insert air guitar here) of the 70 pounds I want to initially loose.

Looking at all this information does two things. First it makes me really happy with where I am. Second it makes me think that I can actually hit my goal within a reasonable amount of time. When I got started on this I was expecting to have to fight this all year, and I will continue the good habits I have developed once I hit 250, however if my weight loss stays at 4 pounds per week I should be seeing 250 a week or two before Flipside. (No, I am not going, just thought that date would make more sense to people.) Not bad for what will have been just about four months worth of work.

Then I can start exploring the territory below 250 to see where I can end up. Suddenly 220 is not looking like an unattainable goal.

While I was writing this missive Gmail decided to throw the following links at me in the Sponsored Links area. They make me giggle so I thought I would share them with you:

http://www.how-to-get-rid-of-man-boobs.com

http://www.truthaboutabs.com

God I love Google ads some days.

Shall we delve into the "Holy shit, you ate THAT?!?!?!" list for the week? And fair warning, Friday is pretty grim.

Friday - 4-4-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 cup Orange/Tangerine juice
Chicken Teriyaki
Tazo Giant Peach Tea
Boiled cabbage with bacon bits
Fried rice
2 egg rolls
Bowtie pasta with mushroom stroganoff sauce
Spaghetti with a olive oil, pepper and parsley sauce
Chocolate and caramel tart with Bailey's ice cream
More snacks than you can shake a baby at
45 minutes on the elliptical

Saturday - 4-5-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 cup Orange/Tangerine juice
2 serv. Kefir
1 serv. Whey protein
1 Yoplait yogurt
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
Walked 5+ miles.

Sunday - 4-6-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 cup Orange/Tangerine juice
2 serv. Kefir
1 serv. Whey protein
Iced tea (no sugar)
Philly cheese steak
Fries
1 pint Guinness
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
Walked 4+ miles

Monday - 4-7-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 cup Orange/Tangerine juice
1 Yoplait yogurt
2 Tuna salad sandwiches
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
45 minutes on the elliptical
Walked 4 miles.

Tuesday - 4-8-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
11.5 oz. V8
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
1 Apple
Bowl of egg drop soup
General Tso's Chicken*
Rice
Iced tea (no sugar)
45 minutes on the elliptical

Wednesday - 4-9-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Asparagus
1/4 box Jambalaya Chicken Helper
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
45 minutes on the elliptical
Walked 6+ miles

Thursday - 4-10-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
Beef and vegetable soup (Korean style, awwww yeah)
45 minutes on the elliptical

* There is a joke about General Tso and The Colonel in here but I can't quite get to it right now. I will have to ruminate on this.

BOOK REVIEW - Storm Front

2008-04-09T22:49:00.000-05:00

Storm Front (Book 1 of the Dresden Files)
Jim Butcher
ROC, 2000
322 pages

Like many I came to the Dresden Files by way of the short-lived television show on Sci Fi. Actually I did not even bother to watch the show on Sci Fi but rather downloaded the pilot episode via iTunes (for free) and watched it while processing data at the office. While there were some interesting concepts in there I felt the show pretty much sucked out loud and thus was done with the Dresden Files. Then I stumbled across an off-handed comment in a post* on Ragnell's Written World which indicated the sucktacular TV show was actually based on a series of books. This piqued my interest a little bit as Lisa (Ragnell) indicated she liked the books and as she has good taste in these matters I thought they might be an interesting read. Ultimately I did nothing about it because my life is already choked with tons of reading I am not getting done and the last thing I needed were more books around the house. Some time after that I ended up discussing the series with a good friend of mine who tends to have impeccable taste. (This statement ignores his love for premium tequila which will forever remain a mystery to me as all tequila, I don't care HOW good it is, tastes like ass.) He highly recommended both the Dresden series and, even more enthusiastically, Butcher's Codex Alera series. This made me even more interested in the books but again I came back to the point that I already have way too much media around the house waiting for me to consume. Finally as I was scouring the Murder By the Book website for any news of a Barry Eisler signing I noticed that Jim Butcher was going to be doing a signing in the immediate future. As I am callow and all about getting stuff signed so I walked over to the store and picked up Small Favor, the most recent Dresden book, as well as Storm Front, the premiere Dresden book. My objective was to read Storm Front on Sunday so I could know SOMETHING about the man and his writing before getting the chance to meet him.

Thanks to a late night and a somewhat liberal attitude towards what some call working hours I managed to succeed in my appointed task.

A task, as it turns out, which was very pleasant. After reading the first novel I could see why people are such fans, but I am getting ahead of myself here. For those of you who do not know, the Dresden Files all feature the adventures of wizard Harry Blackstone Copperfield Dresden in his capacity of wizard-for-hire and occasional consultant for the Chicago PD. In his novel debut Harry is called in to look into a grisly double-murder where the victims hearts were ripped from their chests while they are in the midst of making the two-backed beast. At almost the exact same time he is asked to track down a missing husband who might have been monkeying around with dark magic before he went AWOL. Along with all that Dresden becomes entangled with "Gentleman" Johnny Marcone, the capo di tutti capi of the Chicago underworld who is interested in keeping Dresden on the sidelines for this particular investigation. Above and beyond all this Dresden labors under the Doom of Damocles, a stricture handed down by the White Council which puts Dresden in a precarious place when researching magic of this magnitude. Having burdened our hero with enough baggage, Butcher then allows the true fun to begin.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book, so much so that I went ahead and purchased the second and third book in the series at the signing and am already WELL into the second book and I am probably going to be a little Dresden-centric until I can tear through the series. I find I really enjoy long series as it allows me to move in to the author's world, become acquainted with it and then settle in comfortably. Many series reach this point and then POOF you reach the final book and the characters and world with which the reader has become so familiar with are never heard from again. Having said this, there are plenty of series and worlds which have over-stayed their welcome (I'm looking at you Dragonriders of Pern). Keeping an ongoing series interesting, challenging, and yet comfortable for the reader has to be an enormous challenge, part of which Butcher trims away by firmly grounding his novel in the mystery/thriller tradition which has become more prevalent in fantasy novels as the genre sometimes called urban fantasy. By utilizing the police procedural as a broad setting for the Dresden novels, Butcher gives the problems faced by his characters a sense of urgency which goes beyond that conveyed in his prose as well as providing readers who may be unfamiliar with fantasy tropes an easy way in to the world he has created.

Boy howdy this place needs an editor. That last paragraph was pretty much everywhere. Let's try again, shall we?

I highly recommend the book. Butcher seamlessly blends elements from several genre's in these novels and them dips them in a coating of geek-friendly wit. If you dig my sense of humor than I think you'll dig these novels.

BONUS CONTENT TIME (aka OMGPONIES!!1!!)**

1. To illustrate how much of a geek Mr. Butcher is I can only offer this. He showed up to the signing wearing a Sunnydale t-shirt. In fact it was THIS Sunnydale shirt, or its cousin.

2. During the Q&A session, which ended up being the entire thing as Butcher does not have a little spiel he gives and foregoes a reading in the hope his fans can read***, he told the story of how Bob came to be. Before this story is funny you have to understand two things. First Bob is some sort of spirit that has been imprisoned in a skull. Bob has been around for several centuries and provides Dresden with an immense library of magical knowledge and experience from whence Dresden can draw when needed. You may find yourself wondering WTF Dresden is doing with a talking head and why doesn't he use a computer like a normal person? Well he's a wizard, you twit, and this brings us to my second point, that being that wizards cannot use electronic devices without wrecking havoc upon them. The secret origin of Bob, who is nothing more than a floating head, is a bit funnier and demonstrates the level of smart-assery Butcher likes to embrace. There comes a time in every story where you need to drop some exposition on your audience. This is done with varying levels of competence but it almost always comes off as a bit boring. Perhaps the worst way exposition happens "on screen" is when one character begins with, "As you know..." The audience is immediately thinking, "If the character already knows then WHY THE HELL ARE YOU TELLING HIM AGAIN YOU NINCOMPOOP?" Often there will be one character whose entire point is to offer the exposition necessary to advance the plot, or, as I like to call it, whip a little science on the audience's collective ass. The Austin Powers movies handled this character by naming him Basil Exposition and thus poked fun at the characters which seem to be particularly prevalent in the spy genre. During the writing of what was to become Storm Front (its original title was Semiautomagic which just reeks of teh awesome) Butcher had to find a way to explain the rules of the magic system he was developing for the novels without having a character revert to the Basil Exposition School of Exposition. Butcher already had the character of Bob in his head when he was discussing this problem with his writing teacher at the time whose advice was to be sure to not make the character just a talking head, or a character who does nothing but spout exposition and leave. Butcher's mind being what it is took that and gave us Bob as he appears in the novels. A literal talking head. Named Bob.

* I am too lazy to track down the post but I believe Lisa was discussing the Arthurian overtones present in some of the books. It has been a while since I read the post.

** I can't believe I just did that.

*** While I understand where he is coming from, I actually really enjoy hearing an author read their own work. It gives me an idea of how the characters talk in the author's head which adds a layer to the character the next time I am reading.

My Houston - To Nan's And Back Again

2008-04-05T12:49:00.000-05:00

Recently the master moderator on the Star Trek ~~New Voyages~~ Phase II forum posted statistics on where visitors to the website and forum were coming from. This led to a "challenge" to the forum members to post pictures showing where they live. Being somewhat vain and proud of my admittedly limited photography skills I wanted to post a good picture of Houston taken by moi but what to shoot? What is Houston? Do I take a picture of the skyline and submit that? Certainly some people will recognize this as Houston however Houston is SO much more than just downtown.

What do people think of when they think of Houston? I imagine most people will either think of the Astrodome or NASA, specifically Johnson Space Center. I could certainly go take pictures of the Astrodome, now o'er shadowed by the Reliant Center or I could drive down to Clear Lake and take some pictures of the Saturn V and other rockets there. These options also seemed like pandering to the crowd a little, showing them what they expect Houston to be. Of course there are the things in Houston that very few natives would think about, like the San Jacinto Monument which sits on the battlefield where the Texans under Sam Houston defeated Santa Anna's army and won independence for Texas. Houston is the Galleria. Houston is the Museum of Fine Arts Houston. Houston is Jones Hall. Houston is River Oaks. Houston is the Fifth Ward. Houston is so many different things I honestly had no idea what I should share. I was about to give up on the project when it occurred to me that I should show these people what Houston is to me. Where do I like to go? What do I love about Houston? Thus this intermittent series titled "My Houston" was born.

The pictures in this first installment were all taken as I walked too and from Nan's Games and Comics, Too, my local comic shop. The walk is just a bit over four miles and over the past couple of months I have gotten in the habit of walking over there on Saturdays to pick up my books. Now shall we head out?

(Click on the photo to launch the Flickr photoset.)

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 9

2008-04-04T07:23:00.002-05:00

Boy howdy is this post late!

Usually I am so excited about my progress that sending the email is one of the first things I do in the morning however today I was not feeling the excitement AND I had to do some work. We'll have to see about that second one. A man does have his limits after all. As for the first one it is because I was a little disappointed when I stepped on the scale this morning. I only have myself to blame but between going a little off the eating plan this week and, lets face it, unrealistic expectations on my part, I was disappointed when I tipped the scale at a ballerina-esque 275.6 pounds. I REALLY wanted to be down to 275 this week because that weight represents 45 pounds lost and for some reason that became important in my head this week.

I am not discouraged by the result by any stretch of the imagination, after all this still represents a loss of 3.2 pounds over the last week which puts it right around my average weekly weight loss. What I am trying to do is come up with a reasonable weight loss goal for April. I blew my March goal out of the water, having told my boss that I was aiming for 280 but would be satisfied with being at 285. I think my goal for April will be to get below 265, which would be a total loss of 13.8 pounds for the month, however I will be satisfied with being at 267.5 pounds. You might be asking yourself why such an odd number? Well at 267.5 pounds I will have lost 52.5 pounds or, in other terms, three-quarters of the 70 pounds I am trying to loose. On top of that I am expecting my weight loss to stall a bit around 264 as this represents a 20% reduction in body weight since I started my program. I have heard apocryphal evidence to support that weight-loss will stall at the 20% mark however I have not seen, nor gone looking for, any science to back this up. Though lets face it, I have NEVER let lack of actual evidence slow me down when forming dumb opinion on something so why should this be any different?

Last week I went on about a shirt I was able to wear again for the first time, which got me thinking about the shirt I am currently wearing. Just to give you an idea of how large the shirt is, it is one of my Cubavera shirts which I bought at Casual Male XXL. The shirt is a 3XLT (that triple-extra-large tall for those of you who wear things like M or GrrANIMALS.) When I started this whole process I would wear the shirt to work but would have to unbutton it before I sat because my gut was pushing the buttons to the ragged edge of their gut-retention limit. Now I am sitting in my chair, slouching down and I cannot get the front of the shirt to pull even a little bit when I pooch my gut out. This is really cool. And my posture as I attempt this must be doing WONDERS for my back. Stop now? Okay, I think I might.

On a final note, in the wake of last week's update a TON of people both reassured me that these emails were not unwelcome AND told me that my process has provided some inspiration to them to deal with some of the same issues I struggle with throughout this process of getting healthier. After reading some of the responses to last week's update I went through and actually re-read the email. As I was reading it what was funny to me when I wrote it just came off as passive-aggressive emo-whine which was not my intent at all. I went in search of teh funny and wound up at teh emo. I think I'll go listen to some Fallout Boy now thank you very much. I mean sorry 'bout that. Also to everyone who noted I have inspired them in some way? You have NO idea how awesome that makes me feel. Thanks for letting me know.

Friday - 3-28-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 Banana
Tazo Organic Iced Green tea
Bacon cheeseburger
Fries
2 egg rolls
Iced tea (no sugar)
Bacon cheeseburger
Fries
40 minutes on the elliptical

Saturday - 3-29-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
2 hot dogs
Chicken and green chilis
Rice
Refried beans
Peach cobbler with whipped cream
Lemonade

Sunday - 3-30-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Chicken fried steak
Broccoli and rice casserole
Fries
1/2 order of bacon cheese fries
Iced tea (no sugar)
11.5 oz. V8
Med. salad with ham, turkey, Ranch, and 1/2 hard-boiled egg

Monday - 3-31-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 cup Orange/Tangerine juice
Chips and queso
2 Chili rellenos
Charro beans
Iced tea (no sugar)
Spicy beef and kimchi stew
Rice
40 minutes on the elliptical

Tuesday - 4-1-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 cup Orange/Tangerine juice
11.5 oz. V8
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
Spicy beef and kimchi stew
Rice
45 minutes on the elliptical

Wednesday - 4-2-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 cup Orange/Tangerine juice
1 Banana
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
Spicy beef and kimchi stew
Rice
45 minutes on the elliptical

Thursday - 4-3-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 cup Orange/Tangerine juice
Lg. nachos with beef, beans, and Jalapenos
1 Tortilla
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
45 minutes on the elliptical

Old Negro Space Program

2008-04-03T13:28:00.003-05:00

This is a brilliant little production was produced for a Nebula in 2006 however was disqualified as it was not professionally produced. It is definitely worth a look. Beware the harsh language:

BOOK REVIEW - House of Cards

2008-03-30T23:24:00.002-05:00

House of Cards (Star Trek: New Frontier #1)
Peter David
Pocket Books, 1997
168 pages

I suppose it is a good thing when my biggest complaint about a book is the value proposition in buying the book itself, something we have seen in my other book reviews so this should be old-hat for you guys. With a cover price of $3.99, which is a purchase price of $4.32 after taxes, I would like to think that I am getting more than the approximately 168 story pages offered by this book. As I am typing this it occurs to me that I buy comics every week which offer only 22 story pages for a dollar less so maybe I should just shut the hell up on this particular topic. Perhaps it is best if we just move on to the actual contents of the book and forget this ever happened, shall we?

House of Cards introduces us to the new characters of M'k'n'zy, a Xenexian freedome fighter cum Starfleet officer, and Soleta an half-Romulan half-Vulcan scientist who seems to, despite her desire to be Vulcan, have a slightly rebellious streak to her. The book begins twenty years in the past with M'k'n'zy, who eventually changes his name to Mackenzie to get around people mispronouncing his name, as he fights the Danterian occupiers of his home planet as a teen. I will admit that at first I was concerned with how this might turn out, particularly since rather than just a short chapter this introduction to M'k'n'zy takes up over a quarter of the book, however in the end David's storytelling instincts were correct and this introduction does an excellent job of creating the character who will be central to the forthcoming tales.

After introducing us to M'k'n'zy, David then spends about twenty pages introducing us to Soleta and another twenty or so introducing us to Selar, the Vulcan medical officer who appeared in the TNG episode "The Schizoid Man," before we are finally brought to the present day (that being the time shortly after the events depicted in Star Trek First Contact). In the present we meet several familiar faces from the Enterprise-D as well as Admirals Jellico and Nechayev and are brought up to speed on the collapse of the Thallonian Empire, the ensuing humanitarian concerns, and Starfleet's response, which is to dispatch a single ship to observe and render aid where necessary.

When it was published in 1997 House of Cards represented a new and risky venture in the Star Trek universe. Peter David, John J. Ordover and Pocket Books were going to slip free of the bonds of Star Trek's familiar characters and explore new main characters, moving beyond the various cults of personality that each individual Star Trek series represents and pushing Star Trek as a setting and a theme. This was a risky move, despite the acclimation David's work had met with in fandom, due to the nature of Star Trek fandom. As I rule I dislike lumping a diverse group of people together however, with the notable exception of hardcore Transformers fanboys (and don't get me started on those chowderheads) Star Trek fans seem to truly be the most hidebound and vocal fans in sci fi, often dismissing new things out of hand before even giving them a chance to succeed or fail on their own merits.* Fortunately for all concerned it appears that the New Frontier experiment succeeded, quite possibly beyond anyone's expectation. With sixteen New Frontier novels now published, the recent release of the first New Frontier comic from IDW and the start of the Vanguard line of novels in 2005 it seems that perhaps fandom is more open minded than I give it credit for. Of course it does not hurt that this initial book was an enjoyable read. It was nice to escape the familiar faces and concentrate on new characters and new stories.

* For example look at all of the hubbub about J.J. Abrams changing the design of the Enterprise for the new movie, much of it coming before 99.99% of fandom had seen ANY smidge of the ship. I would also like to note that this sort of attitude is THE EXACT OPPOSITE of the ideals enshrined at the core of Star Trek. I think there are some interesting parallels between hardcore and hidebound Trekkies who have lost sight of the forest for the trees and many modern Christians who have done the same and this just furthers the idea that radicals of ANY stripe are not a good thing.

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 8

2008-03-28T06:47:00.001-05:00

Tired of these thing yet?

Too bad 'cause they're just going to keep on coming! Particularly as long as the news remains good news and this week's news? Oh yeah, it DEFINITELY qualifies as good news. This morning I weighed in at a svelte 278.8 pounds which brings my total loss to 41.2 pounds. For you science-types out there who love their percentages, and who doesn't, this means that 12.875% of pre-February 1st James has gone missing. Clearly things are going well despite me not necessarily eating like I am on any sort of diet (See Friday's and Wednesday's menus below if you doubt this assessment.)

Beginning on Wednesday of this week I went ahead and pushed my morning workout to 40 minutes on the elliptical as well as bumping the level up two difficulty levels on the machine. I found that after 30 minutes on the previous level I was not very tired after my workout let alone ragged out an barely able to walk. Clearly it was time to take things to the next level, or in this case the next next level. I feel pretty ragged out after the 40 minutes and getting through the 40 minutes is challenging, but I fell pretty good for the rest of the day so I think the decision was the right one.

The biggest motivator I encountered this week was a shirt I had bought back before my first trip to Korea. Shortly before heading to Korea for my brother's wedding my suit pants decided it was time to give out and thus a trip to Men's Wearhouse was required to quickly replace said suit. While there I got suckered in to buying this shirt that I REALLY liked, an almost French blue button-up, which fit my neck and arm measurements however I suspected it was not as long as I like my shirts. I was right and thus I was not able to wear the shirt. I wear my pants a little low, beneath my gut, therefore I prefer my shirts to be very long otherwise they tend to pull out of my pants at the sides, something which I find tacky and personally very distracting when it happens to me. Regardless of the fact it was ill-fitting I wore the shirt a couple of times because I REALLY like the color and I think it, the color, looks VERY good on me. Due to the fit issues I was very self-conscious when I wore the shirt and therefore it has been relegated to the Some Day side of the closet. Well, last night as I was trying to decide what I wanted to wear to the office today and packing for College Station I went ahead and pulled the shirt out on a lark and decided to try it on. The fucker actually fit pretty well and while I still cannot really wear it tucked in, it looks just fine being un-tucked as my once prodigious gut is not quite as prominent these days and thus the shirt hangs a bit better. I know this is somewhat silly in light of the larger positive outcomes I am seeing from this process however it provided a HUGE boost last night which has carried over to today.

One thought that has haunted me from the beginning of this process is when am I going to fail? I have HUGE amount of self-doubt and have failed at these sorts of initiatives before therefore part of me thinks it is only a matter of time before I fuck up pretty badly. Once that happens I have real trouble getting back on the horse. In the past this has been the downfall of the diet program. So far things are going far better than I expected, both physically and mentally, and I find myself eager to hop on the scale Friday morning to see where I am at in the process. With all of the success I have been having and quite frankly how easy the success has been, I find myself wondering WTF has taken me so long to get going with this process. The other thing I found myself wondering this week is whether 250 pounds might have been too conservative of a goal? I know I am tempting the Fates by thinking this way and therefore I am banishing the thoughts from my head. I have to HIT 250 before I can start lowering the bar.

Anyhoo, thanks for sticking with me through this process. I think a lot of my success here has to do with the fact that I feel accountable to my friends and loyal readers whom I have drafted in to this process.

Friday - 3-21-08
The Drink
2 scrambled eggs
Corned beef hash
4 pcs. of bacon
English Muffin (1/2 with jam)
Sm. Orange juice
Hash browns
Black Currant Tea (No sugar)
Lg. salad with grilled chicken, bacon bits and creamy Parmesan dressing
Cup of chili
Moules Gratin (Mussels gratin with Parmesan cheese)
Carbonade Flammande (Belgian beef stew prepared with Maredsous beer, onions and carrots)
Mashed potatoes

Saturday - 3-22-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
12 oz. bowl of Creamy New Potato soup
1 serv. Oatmeal with skim milk
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
2 Nature Valley Oats-n-Honey Granola Bars
Walked 4+ miles

Sunday - 3-23-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
2 serv. Kefir
1 serv. Whey protein
1/4 box of Potatoes Stroganoff Hamburger Helper made with turkey
1/4 bag of Broccoli & Carrots with Garlic and Herbs
1 lg. cup apple juice
11.5 oz. V8
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
Walked 6+ miles.

Monday - 3-24-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
11.5 oz. V8
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
1/3 box Chili Cheese Hamburger Helper
1/3 can green beans
30 minutes on elliptical

Tuesday - 3-25-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
11.5 oz. V8
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
2 Nature Valley Apple Crisp Granola Bars
1/3 box Chili Cheese Hamburger Helper
1/3 can green beans
1 pint Guinness
30 minutes on elliptical

Wednesday - 3-26-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Iced tea (no sugar)
Cup of seafood gumbo
Crab and cornbread stuffed jumbo shrimp wrapped in bacon
Horseradish mashed potatoes
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
40 minutes on the elliptical

Thursday - 3-27-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Largish salad with avocado, bacon bits, chicken breast strips and Ranch
Iced tea (no sugar)
11.5 oz. V8
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
40 minutes on the elliptical

The New Maths

2008-03-27T22:30:00.001-05:00

So Tuesday evening I met a couple of friends out at the Kelvin Arms and after seven weeks of consuming no alcohol of any stripe I thought I would celebrate my success in loosing weight AND making it through Lent without breaking my Lenten abstinence by having a single pint of Guinness. The next morning I awoke to learn:

1 pint Guinness + James = Hangover

This sucks worse than calculus.

Scratch-n-Sniff

2008-03-25T23:21:00.001-05:00

Over the weekend my mother and I went to see the Pompeii exhibit at the Museum of Fine Arts Houston and the Lucy exhibit at the Houston Museum of Natural Science. At the Lucy exhibit I picked up the book The Hunt for the Dawn Monkey: Unearthing the Origins of Monkeys, Apes, and Humans by Chris Beard. Now, as the title suggestions, is all about the search for Eosimias (dawn monkey in Latin or Greek) and given my simian obsession is a must-read. Then I stumbled across this quote:

While such a predilection is common among lemurs, the dominance of visual pornographic media, rather than scratch-and-sniff cards, demonstrates that the same pattern does not hold among at least some anthropoids.

How often do you get to read about monkeys and scratch-and-sniff porn in a book where it is not pretending to be science but actually is science? Not often enough, me thinks, not often enough by far.

(BTW. You should go and check out the Lucy exhibit before it leaves town April 27th. It is well worth the money.)

BOOK REVIEW - World Without End

2008-03-24T22:13:00.001-05:00

World Without End
Joe Haldeman
Bantam, 1979
150 pages

World Without End arguably predates the Pocket Books Star Trek publishing bonanza with which I was to become far too familiar during my teenage years. While I am a confirmed Trekkie and have enjoyed many thousands of pages of Trek fiction I was not aware of this book's existence until I stumbled across it during a recent visit to the local Half-Price Books. I snapped it up, along with a 1968 edition of Whitfield and Roddenberry's The Making of Star Trek, for a couple of bucks and brother, those two bucks were the best money I have spent on books in a long while.

In World Without End the Enterprise encounters a spherical spaceship which uses a primitive Bussard ramjet for propulsion. The hull of the vessel is disguised as a planetoid and lined with an impossibly heavy metal which makes communication difficult at best. Then when Kik, McCoy and the away team get into a tight spot with the indigenous beings, a type of sentient bipedal flying squirrel, they realize they cannot beam back to the ship. Meanwhile the Enterprise itself has been trapped by the alien ship and is loosing power.

As I indicated earlier, I really enjoyed reading this book even if the resolution owes more to a deus ex machina than the ingenuity of the crew and I highly recommend it to any Star Trek fans out there and would go so far as to suggest it to someone looking for a light sci fi adventure along the lines of Heinlein's Have Spacesuit, Will Travel or Starman Jones. No obtrusive social commentary here, just good adventure in an alien world.

When I sat down to finally write this review I was trying to quantify what it is that I like about these early Star Trek novels. So far both of them I have read (you can check out my review of Gerrold's Galactic Whirlpool here) have been mush more enjoyable than the average Star Trek novel. I think part of this may be due to the authors involved as both David Gerrold and Joe Haldeman are masters in the field of science fiction, however other Trek authors are no slouches. I think it can be boiled down to the fact that novels which predate the released of Star Trek: The Motion Picture do a better job of preserving the feeling of the television series where novels written after 1979 seem to be trying to be more cinematic in scope and thus loose something which makes Star Trek work for me.

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 7

2008-03-21T20:31:00.000-05:00

Not a whole lot to say today. My mom is in town and I am dashing this off between visits to the museum and meeting Mr. & soon-to-be Mrs. Tunacan for dinner.

I dropped another 3.8 pounds this past week which takes my total loss to 36.8 pounds. I am now tipping the scales at a down right petite 283.2 pounds! The most important thing to come out of this week is the fact that I have passed the half-way point on this trip. I AM OVER HALF WAY TO MY GOAL! I could not be more excited about this! If my weight loss stays consistent with the loss I have seen the last few weeks I should be doing this for just another ten weeks or so, putting the end of this stage of the diet around the end of May. I do not expect this to happen as I expect my weight loss to plateau at some point, however it gives me a good place to start.

Friday - 3-14-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
6 Taco Bell tacos
2 Chicken Grilled Stuft Burritos
Med. Salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
30 minutes on the elliptical

Saturday - 3-15-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Bowl of chicken minestrone soup
Small salad with blue cheese, walnuts and some sort of vinegrette dressing
Med. Salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy hot V8
2 hours of hockey

Sunday - 3-16-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 serv. kefir
1 serv. Whey protein
Med. Salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
Iced tea (no sugar)
Cup of Baked Potato soup
1 1/2 fish cakes
French fries
Walked 4+ miles

Monday - 3-17-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
11.5 oz. V8
Med. Salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, turkey, ham, and Ranch
1/4 box Potatoes Stroganoff Hamburger Helper made with turkey
1/4 bag Broccoli & carrot with garlic & herbs
30 minutes on the elliptical

Tuesday - 3-18-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
11.5 oz. V8
Med. Salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, turkey, ham, and Ranch
1/3 box Chili Cheese Hamburger Helper
1/3 can green beans
30 minutes on the elliptical

Wednesday - 3-19-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Potato-crusted mahi mahi with au gratin potatoes, leek & roasted garlic cream sauce and fried leeks
Cup of Manhattan Fish Chowder
Iced tea (no sugar)
Med. Salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
30 minutes on the elliptical

Thursday - 3-20-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
8 pieces of sushi
1 California roll
Small salad with ginger dressing
Iced tea (no sugar)
Large Caesar salad with chicken
3 small slices of garlic bread
30 minutes on the elliptical

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 6

2008-03-14T23:19:00.000-05:00

This morning I just noticed that I have now completed six weeks of this loosing weight thing and thought to myself, "Six fucking weeks? Holy shit Private Pyle." (Yes, I do actually talk to myself in R. Lee Ermy's voice at times. I think it freaks out the neighbors and this is a good thing.)

I dropped another 3.4 pounds this week which means I am tipping the scales at a downright petite 287 pounds. This brings my total loss to 33 pounds over the last six weeks and puts me 2 pounds shy of the half-way point of 35 pounds lost. I am really pleased with the progress I am making!

This week I started doing The Drink in the mornings again and I am going to try and stick with it for a couple of weeks even if it is foul, foul crap and makes me want to stay in bed just to avoid it. I also hit the gym five days this week instead of the usual two. On Tuesday and Thursday I only did 20 minutes on the elliptical instead of my usual half-hour but I plan to work up to that.

Well that's about all I have this week except for this moment from Val Kilmer Mash-up Theater:

I was thinking of the immortal words of Hollywood who said "Where'd who go?"

Shall we take a look at Ye Olde Foode Journale?

Friday - 3-7-08
1 Yoplait yogurt
1 Fuze Slenderize drink
Bacon Cheeseburger
Fries
2 egg rolls
1 Tazo Giant Peach tea
3 pieces of 12" deep dish pizza with whole wheat crust topped with ground beef, pepperoni, ham, bacon, and double Italian sausage
Iced tea (No sugar)
30 minutes on the elliptical

Saturday - 3-8-08
1 Yoplait yogurt
1/3 box Philly Cheesesteak Hamburger Helper made with turkey
Asparagus
Medium salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
Walked 5.7 miles

Sunday - 3-9-08
1 Yoplait yogurt
3 pieces of 12" deep dish pizza with whole wheat crust topped with ground beef, pepperoni, ham, bacon, and double Italian sausage
1 cup Kefir
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. Spicy Hot V8
Walked 8.1 miles

Monday - 3-10-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
1 bottle Lipton Green Tea with Citrus
1/2 cup rice
Spicy beef and kimchi stew
30 minutes on the elliptical

Tuesday - 3-11-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1.5 serv. Kashii Go Lean cereal
Skim milk
New York strip with bordelaise sauce
Black truffle creamed spinach
1.5 dinner rolls with butter
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
20 minutes on the elliptical

Wednesday - 3-12-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Banana
Medium salad with a hard-boiled egg, chicken chunks, and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
1/4 box of Potato Stroganoff Hamburger Helper made with turkey
1/4 bag of Broccoli and Carrots with garlic and herbs
30 minutes on the elliptical
Walked 2.4 miles

Thursday - 3-13-08
The Drink
1 serv. Metamucil
1 Yoplait yogurt
Medium salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
1/4 box of Potato Stroganoff Hamburger Helper made with turkey
1/4 bag of Broccoli and Carrots with garlic and herbs
20 minutes on the elliptical

BOOK REVIEW - Old Man's War

2008-03-13T18:47:00.000-05:00

Old Man's War
John Scalzi
Tor, 2005
314 pages

After a year of suffering Mr. Wheaton's pimpin' (or is that Zombi pimpin'?) John Scalzi's debut science fiction novel Old Man's War I finally got off my not quiet as fat as it used to be ass and picked up a copy during one of my walks last weekend. I think the fact that I bought the book last Saturday and completed it Wednesday evening will tell you more about the book than any words I write here.

I did not tear through Old Man's War because it was an easy read but rather the quality of Scalzi's writing forced me to continue. The novel was perfectly paced and I was compelled to continue reading, even when I should have been turning out the light and going to sleep. (This book is directly responsible for me getting out of bed late twice this week.) However with all this praise I am getting a bit ahead of myself here.

Old Man's War is the story of John Perry and what he did on his seventy-fifth birthday. He visited his wife's grave. Then he joined the army, or rather the Colonial Defense Forces. Mankind has made it out of our own solar system and begun to colonize other worlds. The problem is the universe is full of aliens and worlds worth colonizing are few an far between. This means competition for the usable worlds is fierce and the CDF is the only line of defense for the human colonies. The CDF does not accept young recruits. They want recruits that have a lifetime of experience thus you can only join up once you reach retirement age. Once you join up and leave Earth you can never come back. After your term of enlistment ends, which starts at two years but can be extended to ten, then you are given a homestead.

The mark of any great science fiction is that at it's core the story is about the human condition as it exists today. Actually now that I type that, it is really the mark of ALL great fiction, science or not. Old Man's War clearly fits this definition and takes a place alongside Heinlein's Starship Troopers and Card's Ender's Game as a masterpiece where the social commentary is encapsulated in a military setting. I HIGHLY recommend this book.

Bonus Content Time!!!

Here is John Scalzi speaking at an Authors@Google event in April of 2007:

BOOK REVIEW - Foreign Foes

2008-03-10T23:08:00.002-05:00

Foreign Foes (Star Trek: The Next Generation #31)
Dave Galanter and Greg Brodeur
Pocket, 1994
276 pages

Foreign Foes opens with Captain Picard and the crew of the Enterprise hosting delegations of Klingons and Hirdans at a peace conference intended to end the seventy-year-old conflict between these two races as well as bring about a modicum of cooperation as they both face internal issues which the opposing party can assist in resolving. The Hirdans, having suffered decades of oppression and war at the hands of the Klingon agressors, are blinded by their hatred of the Klingons and with the death of the Hirdan ambassador, apparently at the hands of the Enterprise's own Worf, things quickly spin out of control. While Picard struggles to hold things together on Velex, Riker and Troi have gone AWOL and Data begins to act irrationally.

Before we go any further I have to let you know that of the various Star Trek novels I have read for some reason I have consistently found the Next Generation novels to be my least favorite of the bunch. This holds true across the line, regardless of the author therefore this novel started out behind the eight ball as far as I am concerned. I am not certain why this is as I enjoy the television series. Enough about me, let's talk about the book, shall we?

I picked this book up because I have recently become acquainted with Dave Galanter via these fancy internets* you kids go on about and felt it would be good for me to acquaint myself with some of the man's work. To be brutally honest the book did not grab me from the get go and thus it was difficult for me to grind through the book. Galanter and Brodeur are clearly capable authors and it shows that this was their freshman effort. I look forward to reading some more of their work and seeing them grow.

* It's pipes, dammit!

The Calculus of the Soul

2008-03-09T22:36:00.002-05:00

Inspired by this bit from 60 Second Science I spent part of my morning contemplating dark matter. It started with a joke based on the conception of dark matter being created when a scientist could not get his numbers to work with everything he knew. There was an effect that he could not account for therefore this scientist posited that something must be causing said effect. Since he could not see anything which would cause it then he would call this affecting agency Dark Matter and thus his formula worked. Basically I was poking fun at what appears to be a little cheating on the part of scientists to make their math work. This is the kind of crap I got in trouble for in school all the time.

Since I am a rational, well somewhat rational, adult who loves him some science, I understand the scientific process and understand the creation of the concept of dark matter is a result of this process that has been vetted by many people far smarter than I. Therefore I believe dark matter exists, however as I was thinking about this it occurred to me that for us unscientific types we have to take a lot of what Science tells us on faith. For some reason Hebrews 11:1 popped in to my head. This verse says, "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen."*

This got me thinking that the arguments for why one should believe in the conclusions being derived from the more complex forms of science, such as quantum physics or cosmology, and the arguments for the existence of the divine are not so very different. In the end the argument will come to a point where you have to trust someone who has more knowledge and experience in the particular field. Both arguments rest on either direct experience or faith in what someone is telling you is the truth. Of course in questions of science you can set out to learn everything you need to know to construct the proof of what you have been told. It is conceivable for you to do this from the ground up via the scientific method and at the end of this process you will hold the sacred knowledge of SIN and COS; of quarks and leptons; of Heisenberg and Einstein.

Then there is the question of the divine? Can one prove the existence of divinity? You can, much like proving the existence of dark matter, spend years delving into the divine, studying what the great thinkers have said over the past several millennia. Read Thomas Aquinas, Plato, the Koran, and the Pali Canon. You can attend different masses across the world, spend a season in meditation in a temple, or hours in a sweat lodge. Who knows what you will see and experience on this journey as you gather the sacred knowledge. At the end will you be able to prove the existence of the divine? Is there some calculus of the soul out there waiting to be discovered or are we stuck having to have faith in those who have seen the truth?

I believe Truth exists, both in science and spirituality and that Plato had the right of it. There is a Universal Truth which each one of us holds within us. The scientific method allows us to work our way down to the truth of the physical world but it is our accumulated experiences and learning that allow us to work our way down to truth on the spiritual side.

I firmly believe in science and the methods we use to learn about the world. I also firmly believe that I have a soul and that soul is divine, at least in nature. To a certain extent I am confused by people who allow dogma to force them in to positions on the natural world which are untenable in the face of the evidence. To me they are no different than the Holocaust deniers which seem to pop up with alarming regularity. Even worse they are hypocrites since they expect people to accept the existence of the divine on faith while they themselves cannot accept provable facts, even if the proof is beyond their capacities.

I am not certain what my point is anymore as I have wandered fairly far afield from what I initially wanted to say. I guess this has turned into a stream of consciousness piece. I would like to close with this quote from Shakespeare:

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

Hamlet, Act I, Scene IV

I think these are important words to live by. There is always something new in the world that you never considered.

And just so you know, the Fearsome Flagellum is so my next sports team's name.

* This is the translation from the New American Standard Bible as shown here.

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 5

2008-03-07T22:14:00.001-06:00

I am not feeling particularly chatty today, although in light of my 5.4 pound loss this week I had an excellent line earlier about being just like the American economy, only without Bernake's desire to turn the dollar into the new lira. Oh well. Let's take a look at the chart, shall we?

Like I said, 5.4 pounds this past week and I am not certain how I managed to do it. I keep expecting things to stall out on me how ever it has not happened yet so yippie! This week I also passed the second and third benchmarks on my list which were loosing 17.5 pounds and then 20 pounds and keeping it off for two weeks. Here is what I ate:

Friday - 2-29-08
1 Yoplait yogurt
Sausage, cheese and egg sandwich on toast
Bacon cheeseburger
Order of fries
2 egg rolls
1 Tazo Giant Peach tea
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and ranch
11.5 oz. V8
30 minutes on the elliptical

Saturday - 3-1-08
1 Yoplait yogurt
3 pieces of small pepperoni, sausage and bacon pizza
Iced tea (no sugar)
2 Nature Valley Oats-n-Honey granola bars
90 minutes of hockey

Sunday - 3-2-08
2 servings of Kashi GoLean cereal
Skim milk
Iced tea (no sugar)
2 English muffins with butter
3 pieces of small pepperoni, sausage and bacon pizza
Med. salad with 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey, and ranch
11.5 oz. V8
Walked 6.6 miles. last 2.4 with 14 pound pack.

Monday - 3-3-08
1 Yoplait yogurt
2 Tuna salad sandwiches on toast
12 oz. V8
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch.
33 minutes on the elliptical

Tuesday - 3-4-08
1 Yoplait yogurt
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
12 oz. V8
1/3 box Philly Cheesesteak Hamburger Helper made with turkey
Asparagus
Walked 2 miles.

Wednesday - 3-5-08
1 Yoplait yogurt
Large salad with avocado, bacon bits, chicken breast strips and Ranch
Iced tea (no sugar)
1 banana
4 Nature Valley Oats-n-Honey granola bars
33 minutes on the elliptical

Thursday - 3-6-08
1 Yoplait yogurt
Med. salad with chicken chunks and Ranch
11.5 oz. V8 (Low Sodium)
Spicy beef and kimchi stew
1/2 cup rice

I had some intestinal issues this week (bet you wanted to know that) so I am going to be adding a serving of Metamucil in the morning to help things along those lines as well as bringing The Drink back in to the mix. I guess I will see you cats next week!

MOVIE REVIEW - 5 Centimeters per Second

2008-03-03T00:07:00.000-06:00

5 Centimeters per Second: A chain of short stories about their distance.
(Byosoku 5 Centimeter)
Makoto Shinkai, director
101 minutes
2007

Shinkai's follow-up to 2004's The Place Promised in Our Early Days (Kumo no Muko, Yakusoku no Basho) is another examination of the themes of love and distance explored in his 2002 piece Voices of a Distant Star (Hoshi no Koe) (I review the manga here) however in this work the distance covered is not interstellar but rather the distance of time which, in some ways, is a greater gulf to cross.

The piece is broken down in to three separate stories, all centered around Takaki Tono. The first story, Cherry Blossom Story, is set in the 1990s. After the end of elementary school Takaki's friend Akari moves out of Tokyo and while the two keep in touch via letters, Takaki knows they are slowly growing apart. When Takaki's parents tell him they are moving to Kagoshima, on the southern island of Kyushu, he decides to go and visit Akari before the opportunity slips away. A train ride that should have only taken a couple of hours is turned in to a journey of epic proportions by a snow storm. Takaki finally arrives hours late and the two spend the night together (not in that way, it is not that sort of anime). They share a kiss and then Takaki has to head back to Tokyo, longing for Akari and yet knowing that they will continue to be pulled apart by time and distance.

The second story, Cosmonaut, is set on the island of Tanegashima, the site of the Tanegashima Space Center. Here we see Takaki in high school with a not very secret admirer, Kanae Sumita. Told from Kanae's point of view, this chapter is about her love for Takaki and her confusion about what she wants to do with her life. Kanae struggles with her desire to tell Takaki how she truly feels about him and then, on the day she decides to tell him, she realizes that Takaki has always been looking at something in the distance and never really saw her. She decides she will love Takaki but she cannot tell him and that night cries herself to sleep.

The final chapter, 5 Centimeters per Second, is set in 2008. Takaki is a computer programmer in Tokyo however he still longs for Akari. Akari is preparing for her upcomming wedding. One day Takaki sees a familiar face at a train crossing. He turns to see if it is Akari but a train comes and blocks his view.

I found the entire piece to be very moving and powerful, and much like Voices of a Distant Star Shinkai had me crying as the world pulls his star-crossed lovers apart. There is something universal in the unrequited or impossible love and despite the cultural differences I am able to identify with his characters. The emotional impact of the stories is heightened by the score which is usually a solo piano playing a very simple tune.

While the genius of Shinkai's work is his characters and their ability to get the viewer emotionally invested in them very quickly, his work is also incredibly beautiful. The spaces in which the characters move are sometimes more important that the characters themselves and contribute to the story in a way that few anime directors embrace.

I cannot find the right combination of words to express how strongly I feel about this piece except to tell you that it is one of my top five anime's of all time, a list inhabited by only one other director, Miyazaki. Check it out as the U.S. DVD release is tomorrow, March 4th.

James: Phase 2

2008-03-02T11:09:00.001-06:00

Around the end of January I had a bit of a breakdown which led to the realization I had gotten away from doing things I love and that I was not happy with where I was headed as a person. This bundle of realizations motivated me to begin a program of changes in my life. The purpose of these changes is to allow me to get back to a James that I like. A James who is more confident in who he is and who is willing to let his freak flag fly.

Last month's obsession with dieting and getting healthier was the first phase in the program of changes I want to make. I decided to concentrate on my physical well-being first since this would be rife with challenges for me and is the single biggest change I need to make. Not to mention that I suspect it will take the longest time to reach my goals in this area.

Phase 2 of this process is getting back to being creative. I love to write however over the past year I have not completed a single writing project besides missives for this blog. I have started and stopped on more projects than I will admit to even thinking about however I have not seen any of them through to completion. I am going to change that starting this month. Beginning with March I want to do my best to produce one work of creative writing a month. Depending on the length of the project will determine how complete it must be by the end of the week. In the case of poems, short stories, and essays I feel it is not unreasonable to have them ready to be submitted for publication by the end of the month, however in the case of my still-dormant Starship Farragut script having the script ready to go out for a first pass by my readers is acceptable.

To this end I am looking for three or four people who are willing to read and critique my rough drafts. The first of which I plan to have done in about two weeks as I want to submit it to the contest detailed below. Contact me via the usual protocols if you are interested in editing my crap. Thanks!

The Fourth Annual Equivocality Writer’s Travel Scholarship

Once again, we’re doing the Writer’s Travel Scholarship. Once again it’s
very simple: you write something, and if it wins you get a round-trip
ticket to anywhere in the world. Really.

In the contest announcements for previous years, I penned elaborate
discussions about why I would do such a thing. Why it might matter. This
year, I don’t feel the need to explain why I think writers need to travel,
and hence why I would want to support that. If you don’t already know,
that’s an even better reason to go abroad. Instead I’ll just say:

I think travel is good. I think writing is good. I think it is important
that writers travel.

As before, I would like to make it clear that I am not specifically
calling for travel writing. Write about your pet dog, if you can do it in
an interesting an enlightening way. This contest is not about travel
writing but writers travelling.

On to the details:

* Applicants must submit a short piece, 10,000 words maximum. Fiction,
non-fiction, whatever, poetry or prose, on any topic.

* Also tell me a little about yourself, where you would go with your free
ticket, for how long, and why. You can’t ever have been to that country
before — I impose this restriction to encourage people to go somewhere
new, rather than using the ticket to visit their overseas girlfriend.
Also, you don’t have to write about your destination. I just want to know
why you want to go there.

* Email entries as an attached document in text or Word format to wts (at)
equivocality (dot) net by April 30th 2008. They will be judged by myself
and my writer friends, the winner to be announced on May 15th 2008.

* To keep things fair, I will not consider pieces I know to be written by
friends or acquaintances. What this means is that if you know me, you must
anonymize your submission (including your email address!)

* Entries must be previously unpublished, there is a limit of one entry
per author, and the ticket is limited to $2000 US. I will work with you to
book the cheapest available round-trip ticket, based on departure and
return dates given to me by the winner. I will try to accomodate these
dates and other preferences as much as possible, but I reserve the right
to shift each date plus or minus up to a week, and to make other choices
such as routing and airline, in order to find the best fare. Other travel
requirements, such as additional destinations or an open return date, may
be accommodated if the winner wishes to make up the difference in cost.

* By submitting a piece, you grant me (Jonathan Stray) limited
web-publishing rights, specifically the right to display it on
equivocality.net and any other sites of I may have some degree of
editorial control over. I reserve no other rights. If someone sees your
work here and wants to publish it, fantastic.

* All decisions are final, and by submitting a piece you agree that I am
under no obligation to award any prize at all. The idea is also to fund a
developing writer who might not otherwise be able to afford to travel, so
please keep this in mind when considering whether to apply. I have no
funding, no committees, no mandate. I’m doing this just because I think
it’s a good idea, so let’s keep it simple

Random Bits

2008-03-01T10:25:00.000-06:00

I think it comes as no surprise that Tony Snow would say, "It turned out to be the most natural job transition I ever had," about his transition from Fox News commentator to White House Press Secretary. The thing I am wondering is whether this is a comment on Tony Snow himself or a comment on the Fox News organization.

You can view the Colbert Report segment where Tony drops this little nugget here.

With the Texas primaries next Tuesday this is somewhat timely and VERY funny. (Although it is no Luftwaffle.)

Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 2008 Election Early

Pete over at A Perfectly Cromulent Blog brought this to my attention. I have to say that I agree with Pete, or rather take a less nuanced view of it and wonder how the fuck these two highlights can even compare? I still tear up every time I see Eruzione put the biscuit in the basket. Please go vote for what maybe the single greatest sporting moment in the history of American sports. I am CERTAIN we all know which one I mean.

Here is the call that I bet people remember from that game even above the Eruzione goal:

While we are on the subject of hockey here is the highlight reel from Thursday night's Dallas game which I discuss here. Richards assists on the first, third, fifth, sixth, and seventh goals. Bourque's short-handed goal is mighty nice and Modano's goal, the Stars second, is just beautiful to watch.

And this? This is what an beating looks like. Morrow works Burish's head like a speed bag.

Fat Fuck vs. Food - Week 4 "One Month"

2008-02-29T17:22:00.003-06:00

INTERIOR DEPARTMENT ADDS CHUBBY JAMES TO ENDANGERED SPECIES LIST

WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an unexpectedly early news conference this morning U.S. Fish & Wildlife Service spokesman Richard LeBlanc announced that as a result of the continuing decline in the Chubby James population the decision has been made to add the Chubby James to the list of endangered species.

Endemic to Texas, and in particular the Houston area, the Chubby James' range once stretched to College Station however in recent years the sightings of Chubby James have primarily been restricted to the Houston metropolitan area. "We began monitoring the situation last fall with the sharp decline in the Chubby James' natural habitat," LeBlanc said. "The situation has become critical early this month when Chubby James sightings dropped sharply in what little habitat still remained in the Houston area. As recently as the beginning of this month the average weight of the Chubby James was known to be about 320 pounds however the most recent sampling of the population indicates that the average Chubby James is now down to 295.8 pounds which, while still chubby, is an alarming decline of 24.2 pounds in the past month."

Renowned Chubby James expert Gebbie Roberts has another take on the event. "Perhaps what we are seeing is not a decline in the population per se, but rather a transformative event. It is not unlike the transformation one sees in mosquitoes in which the larvae enter a pupael stage before becoming the familiar pest we all know."

When asked for a comment, Greenpeace spokesperson Michael Hunt said, "I am honestly glad to hear about his. Our local volunteers are tired of throwing out their backs when we have to drag a beached Chubby James back into the ocean. While our chiropractors might bemoan the loss, this will leave us more time to concentrate on important things like annoying the Japanese."

So I guess you could say things are continuing at a good pace. Here is what I ate this week:

Friday - 2-22-08
1 Yoplait Yogurt
Chicken Teriyaki
Boiled cabbage w/bacon bits
Rice
2 Egg rolls
1 Tazo Giant Peach Tea
Leek and Potato Soup
Maple Syrup & Bacon-Wrapped Pork Loin
Potatoes au Gratin
Mushroom Risotto
Bailey's Ice Cream w/ Caramel
Walked 4+ miles. Last half with 16 lbs. pack

Saturday - 2-23-08
1 Yoplait Yogurt
Turkey sandwich w/swiss on cibatta
Iced Tea (no sugar)
1 serving of Bertolli Rosemary Chicken, Linguini & Cherry Tomatoes
1 Pizza Bagel Bite
1 Tagalong (Girl Scout Cookie)
Played hockey for 2+ hours

Sunday - 2-24-08
2 servings of Kashi Go Lean Cereal
Skim Milk
1 Apple
Medium salad w/ 1/2 hard-boiled egg, ham, turkey & Ranch
11.5 oz. V8
Medium salad w/ chicken chunks & Ranch
11.5 oz. V8

Monday - 2-25-08
1 Yoplait Yogurt
Medium salad w/ hard-boiled egg, turkey, hamm & Ranch
12 oz. V8
1/3 box Philly Cheesesteak Hamburger Helper (made with lean turkey)
Asparagus (steamed)
30 minutes on the elliptical

Tuesday - 2-26-08
2 servings of Kashi Go Lean cereal
Skim Milk
Medium salad w/ 1/2 hard-boiled egg, turkey, ham & Ranch
12 oz. V8
Beef and Vegetable soup

Wednesday - 2-27-08
1 Yoplait Yogurt
Medium salad w/ chicken chunks & Ranch
12 oz. V8
Spicy Beef & Kimchi stew
1/2 cup rice
30 minutes on the elliptical

Thursday - 2-28-08
1 Yoplait Yogurt
Medium salad w/ chicken chunks & Ranch
12 oz. V8
Beef and Vegetable Soup

Well as you can see I went WAY off the rails on eating on Friday evening. I blame Scott for this and not my lack of self-control because as you will note on Saturday I did relatively well. Particularly if one considers I limited myself to two snacks while hanging out at Robin's place where normally I would have consumed far more. To be honest it was not that hard to do, even when standing right by the snacks. I found that while I wanted them I did not CRAVE them and thus it was easy to just have one of each and roll on.

I am particularly proud of myself for continuing to hit the gym in the mornings. I have reached the point where my body is getting used to waking up at 6 in the morning, as evidenced by the fact that every day where my alarm was not set for 6:00AM, I woke up at about 6:30 with the "Holy monkey, my alarm did not go off" panic. I also have found that I am enjoying myself while I work out. Loading the iPod with podcasts has been a HUGE help in this department. As much as I LOVE music, I find working out while listening to something that intellectually engages me is a little easier as I am distracted from what my wimpy body is telling me.

In addition to the three days in the gym I actually went out and played some hockey this weekend. Man was I ragged out after playing however in a couple of interesting developments the small of my back did not hurt like it has the last few times I have been on skates however my glutes hurt until about Wednesday. As achey and breaky as I was on Sunday I still got out of bed relatively early and was able to get a ton of stuff done and, more importantly, I felt great all day. I do wish I had access to a hot tub for post hockey rest and recovery.

With this week's result I have pushed past the first benchmark I set for myself in dropping 10 pounds and keeping it off for two weeks. We all know what this means: RETAIL THERAPY!!! I already know I am going to go ahead and buy myself a Region 2 copy of Sukiyaki Western Django. I am actually in the midst of comparison shopping for this between YesAsia.com and cdjapan.co.jp and find that cdjapan has better prices and faster shipping times. Guess I know where I am going to get my fix. (Plus they had the new Cro-Magnons CD "Cave Party" which I totally need.)*

Now I have a question for you cats. Several people have mentioned the various diets where one purges their digestive system before really digging in. Does anyone out there have any experience with this? Is there any science to back up whether this is actually worth doing or not? Along with this does anyone know if there is any value to getting your bowels cleansed? There are rumors floating around about the various benefits of this. If there is either science or decent anecdotal evidence that this helps in the process I would seriously consider these options at some point.

Finally does anyone out there know what nicotine does to ones metabolism?

One last thing. I have been thinking about having pizza all week and planned on having it for dinner tonight as a reward for myself. Then I realized I am going to a play with a couple of friends tonight and pizza is going to do Bad Things to the back 40, if you catch my meaning, so eating it tonight is out. With my plans for playing hockey tomorrow I am thinking that lunch may be out of the question and I already have a salad for dinner. This leaves Sunday. We shall see but I am now thinking I will hold off a week and enjoy me some pizza next Friday.

Also I have decided to set a goal for the month of March. I would like to be down to 280 by April 1st, which means I have to loose about 3.5 pounds per week. This is below my average for the last month, even if we discount the first week's loss however I am expecting things to get more difficult as I continue to loose weight. Getting down to 280 would be a loss of 40 pounds since I started this thing as well as put me over half-way to my goal weight of 250. Having said all that I will be pleased if I am down to 285 by April 1st as that will be halfway there.

* If anyone out there can read Japanese I would be forever in your debt if I could get you to help me with a few things. I have several CDs which I want to rip to mp3 so I can load them to the iPod but I have NO idea what the song titles are. I do not want a translation of the titles but rather a transliteration of the kanji.

How's that for a debut?

2008-02-28T23:29:00.003-06:00

Initially I was going to write my review of Makoto Shinkai's latest effort 5 Centimeters Per Second tonight however after watching Brad Richards performance in his debut with the Dallas Stars tonight I changed my mind. After all how many times do you get to see a guy get five assists in his first night with a new team? The answer is not very often.

Brad Richards, who won the both the Lady Bing Memorial* and Conn Smythe** Trophies in 2004, came to the Stars via a five player trade with the Tampa Bay Lightning just hours before the trade deadline (which was 3:00pm EST on Feb. 26th). The Lightning sent Brad Richards and goalie Johan Holmqvist to Dallas in exchange for goalie Mike Smith, center Jeff Halpern, winger Jussi Jokinen and a 4th round draft pick in 2009. As sad as I am to see all three of those players leave the Big D behind, Richards made a believer out of me tonight. Five assists in one game is quite an amazing feat even when you are with a team where you have player for years, but to do it on your first night on the job is inspiring. These five assists also marked a career-high night in scoring for Richards and ALMOST doubles his point production from his final five games with the Lightning.

As I said I am sad to see all three of the Dallas players go, however after tonight all I can say is "Welcome to Texas Brad!" Here's hoping he gets to eat from Lord Stanley's Cup again in the near future.

* The Lady Bing Memorial Trophy is awarded to the player who demonstrates the best sportsmanship in the NHL.
** The Conn Smythe trophy is awarded to the playoff MVP.

Nebula Kerfuffle

2008-02-27T23:20:00.000-06:00

This past Friday (Feb. 22nd) the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America (abbreviated SFWA) released the final ballot for their annual Nebula awards. The most recent Star Trek: New Voyages* episode "World Enough and Time" made the final ballot in the Script category, which is to say the script Marc Scott Zicree** and Michael Reeves wrote for "World Enough and Time" made the final cut rather than the episode itself. This has caused quite the stir in some areas which I thought was worthy of comment.

Before going any further you should go and read this post from author Keith R.A. DeCandido. His professional credits include several Star Trek novels*** as well as a host of other media tie-in work. I mention this so that we all understand that DeCandido is not one of those authors who loathes media tie-ins in general or Star Trek in particular, a point which I believe he makes quite clear in his rant however I wanted to drive it home.

I would also like to make it clear right now that I am a fan of Star Trek: New Voyages in general and "World Enough and Time" in particular, so I am biased for them. Also I am not a member of the SFWA. I just wanted all that out in the open before we delve in to things.

Here are the issues I have with what is going on:

First - What is professional? (Or as I like to think of it the "What is the meaning of 'is'" Argument)
While the words fanfic and fan fiction get thrown around quite a bit this distracts from the core rules argument which is about the definition of professionally produced. The Nebula award rules define the script as, "a professionally produced audio, radio, television, motion picture, multimedia, or theatrical script." Does this strictly mean work for which one was paid or does it expand to include work which was done by professionals?

I took a look at the membership requirements for the SFWA hoping to get some help. While the rules are quite explicit in what sort of sales qualify for prose fiction, even delving into what are considered proper markets and venues, the qualifying event for a screenwriter is, "One professionally produced full length dramatic script, with credits acceptable to the Membership Committee." Well this did not help one bit in refining the definition of "professionally produced."

This lack of information does not help us resolve the argument one way or the other and returns us to the question: What does "professionally produced" mean in this context?

Personally I believe it means produced by professionals, regardless of whether anyone got paid for it or not. If you scan the list of people involved with WEaT you will see the overwhelming number of them are professionals in their field and therefore I would say WEaT qualifys.

Second - Barracks Lawyers
I am getting sick of the discussions around fandom about the legality of fan fiction and fan films. Well, that is not strictly true, I am tired of people playing at being lawyers and making sweeping statements about whether something is legal or not or more to the point throwing around the word illegal. Ultimately copyright and trademark law are VERY complex and nuanced fields and very smart people can make convincing arguments on both sides of the issue. I prefer to take the stance that until a court tells someone they are doing something illegal then they are not doing something illegal. In the case of New Voyages this complex question becomes even more complex as there is some sort of agreement in place with CBS that allows New Voyages to continue producing episodes as long as no money is made from the episodes. Therefore while the New Voyages episodes are not licensed by CBS they are acknowledged and approved after a fashion.****

Third - If You Can't Keep It In Your Pants
At least keep it in the family. In posting this rant on his blog rather than addressing this issue internally I think DeCandido and others did both the SFWA and fandom a major disservice. The SFWA is a professional organization and as such certainly has internal mechanisms for handling complaints of this nature. This issue should never have come out of the private SFWA forums. Everyone who went running to the blogosphere with their complaints about WEaT being on the ballot, and this is ignoring whether I feel the complaints were valid or not, were behaving in a manner which I find unprofessional and reprehensible. Sweet monkey Jesus people, science fiction fandom already has enough splits and cliques in it to make South Africa circa 1980 look unified we do not need to go adding to the fire. Particularly if the award in question is, as DeCandido says, "...quite possibly the most useless award in the history of award-giving."

The manner in which many of these writers talk about the SFWA could damage the institution in the eyes of younger writers, something that is already an issue in the wake of the DCMA debacle and webscabs comments of the last year. While I do not believe in censorship and thus certainly acknowledge the right to post these things and bring them into the public eye, I think it is wrong and unprofessional behavior. Having said that I do love me a good blow up on the internet and would be eating popcorn right now if I could.

Fourth - Fighting the Good Fight
I saved this one for last because I did not want what may devolve into an ad hominem attack on DeCandido to distract from my other points. I want to say that I think the core question in DeCandido's argument is a good question and certainly needs to be debated, particularly in the SFWA which seems to have a generational gap issue amongst the membership, and is a question which has come up in other venues (such as are bloggers journalists?). I find his construction of his argument objectionable. To begin with he spends too much time making the argument that WEaT is fan fiction which is a point I would think any rational adult would be willing to concede. If not at first then on the technical grounds that it is not licensed by CBS/Paramount. The repeated invocation of "but it is fan fiction" argument distracted me at first and, in my more uncharitable moments, made me wonder whether this had more to do with what was right or whether DeCandido was pissed that none of his fan fiction, and lets face it that is what tie-in novels are regardless of their status as authorized or not, had made it that far. (Here is the list I was working from when I said that. If I was wrong let me know in the comments and I will eat the appropriate amount of crow for trusting Wikiality.) Or I might be completely off base here and DeCandido might be making the argument that fan fiction does not deserve to be on the ballot and hiding it beneath the veneer of rules lawyering. Finally at one point DeCandido says, "I swear, if anybody trots out the, 'Well, yeah, it's a fan film, but it's soooooo well-written and -produced that it may as well be professionally produced argument...I will personally go to their house and show them what I can do with my brown belt." Seriously? Are you really going to undermine what could have been a decent discussion about the rules and some rather ambiguous statements within the rules that may need to be corrected by whipping out your karate-cock? As the kids say, WTF man? If you are THAT pissed about all this then you are welcome to swing by my house and take a shot at me. I think we can all agree as long as there are no pay phones handy and I am not in my hockey gear you should be pretty safe as you assert your manliness and thus the righteousness of your cause on me.

Guess what? None of this matters as WEaT will stay on the Nebula ballot. (Of course in the big picture none of this really matters anyways but being fans it is more fun to be fighting mad about this than the suffering in Darfur, for example.)

* On the subject of Star Trek New Voyages I have a couple of pieces of information. First the decision has been made to rebrand Star Trek: New Voyages as Star Trek: Phase II. You can read more about it here in the news release from the Star Trek: Phase II website. According to an email I received from one of the P2 people I am still in the running for the production assistant job for the shoot in June however there are still a couple of hurdles to clear. Keep on sending those positive vibes.

** Marc Scott Zicree and David Simkins recently began the Zicree/Simkins Podcast which you should check out. Each week they talk with a person or persons in the entertainment industry. Usually their guests are writers or writer/producers with one or two exceptions so far. The discussions are fascinating and wide-ranging and should be required listening for anyone seriously considering writing in Hollywood. Go check them out.

*** This includes the recent Next Generation novel Q & A which has created some buzz in the Trek world as being one of the best Star Trek novels published last year.

**** I am not privy to the details of this arrangement however James Cawley, the brains behind New Voyages, has repeatedly stated that he would like to get a more formal licensing agreement in place with CBS at some point.

Star Trek + White Rabbit

2008-02-24T23:35:00.002-06:00

Blame Brian. I find doing that is usually safe.