Tuesday, September 12, 2006

New Rules

From time to time on his show Real Time with Bill Maher, Bill Maher does a segment called New Rules. From the September 8th edition of the show:

New Rule: Police cars have too many lights.

The car on “Dragnet” had one light. On “Adam 12,” two lights. These days, police cars have blinking lights, rotating lights, strobe lights. “Car 54, Where Are You?” “Studio 54, where are you?!” I don’t know if I’m being arrested or invited to a rave! If the LAPD caught Rodney King today, they’d probably beat him with glow sticks.

The other new rules from the show were:

  • America must regain its scientific edge by designing and building a Space Shuttle that can fly in the rain.
  • Jennifer Lopez [or here] has to start comparing Jessica Biel’s [or here] ass to Hitler.
  • It’s not a freak accident when a stingray stings someone.
  • Women can’t get mad at men for not noticing their new handbag.
  • Bad presidents happen to good people.

You can view video of the show here.

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